


Lost in Time

by roninarrow



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Atsumu is the singer, Band Fic, Closure, College, Complete, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, M/M, Moving On, Romance, inspired by Given
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:20:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25703476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roninarrow/pseuds/roninarrow
Summary: It's been 6 months since Atsumu and Hinata's break up, and now that a new concert venue event is being held in 2 weeks, Atsumu has to write a new song. However, his words don't match his emotions and actions, having difficulty as time is running out.
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou & Miya Atsumu, Bokuto Koutarou/Miya Atsumu, Hinata Shouyou & Miya Atsumu, Hinata Shouyou & Sakusa Kiyoomi, Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu, Hinata Shouyou/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Miya Atsumu & MSBY Black Jackals
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	1. lost in time

_"i am lost in time, cause this life isn't mine... "_

♫

time skip atsuhina/sakuhina  
band au  
angst and fluff  
all characters are based on the anime haikyuu!! by furudate haruichi


	2. i

_08:32_

_My heart was burned by the sun._

♫

The alarm clock went off, just a sound in the distance to his ears. His eyes hadn't adjusted to the filtered light seeping through the window. Eyes heavy, Atsumu closed them once again, seeing a haze of darkness and light together. It was early in the morning, a time he wasn't used to anymore. A time where it felt like such a drag to get out of bed and start the day.

The tired male was about to doze off until the second alarm, then the third and the fourth came along. He wasn't completely awake yet- not even in the slightest, but he scrambled to find his phone underneath his covers. Grasping it in his hands, he finally shut off the recurring sounds. Atsumu's eyes kept fluttering, trying to adjust to the morning sun.

The golden-haired male rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He finally sat up on his bed, his feet touching the cold wooden floorboards. He only had 30 minutes to get ready now for his work. Atsumu now had the morning shift instead of the evening; working at a corner store. It had small pay, but enough for him to pay his apartment rent.

He did his daily routine: brushing his teeth, fixing his hair, and changing into the required uniform. Glancing at the clock on his phone, it read close to the 9 am mark. Atsumu sped up his tasks, grabbing a spoon and yogurt while at it. Putting on his shoes and coat, he left his small apartment.

He took the same subway train that he rode in the evening as well. It was busy as the morning rush began. Atsumu's head started pounding once he got in the moving transport, his body squished between a rough-looking businessman and a scrawny teenager. He mentally sighed, knowing he'd be in this position for quite some time.

Suddenly, his phone buzzed in his pocket. Stuffing his hand in to grab his phone, he read the content on the blue screen.

_**From: Samu 🍙** _

_**going to Bokuto-san's bday party tomorrow?** _

Atsumu grumbled under his breath. He didn't feel like texting his brother this early in the morning, especially if he was going to talk about a party. Of course, he was going to go, but the reason Osamu decided to text him wasn't just about the party.

**_To: Samu 🍙_ **

**_Ye why wouldnt i?_ **

He really wished he didn't ask that question. In fact, the male already knew the answer. Perhaps he just wanted confirmation, or maybe he hoped it was just a genuine question and not something about his love life.

_**From: Samu 🍙** _

_**youre really asking that?** _

And in the end, he was right. Rolling his eyes, he stuffed his phone back in his pocket. This wasn't the time to think about it. Unfortunately, he had all night for that. He had all night to reminisce on painful memories that he tried to suppress for months. The fact that he would see him was already alarming. He wasn't looking forward to the party, but the main purpose of it isn't to avoid him- but to celebrate his best friend's birthday.

Atsumu stepped out of the train, his limbs screaming for another position other than being cramped. Stretching, he made his way out of the subway. The store wasn't far from the station, in which the male was thankful for.

He made his morning shift on time, opening the little doorway to walk through and eventually do his job. Usually, the students from his university would come in the morning for a quick breakfast. That's what the golden-hair did when he had the evening shift instead.

However, today was slower than usual. Maybe it's because he had a rough morning, or that he didn't eat enough. Whatever it is, the young male was bored and he'd hope he'd hear the door open at least once. Eating a granola bar, he whipped out his phone while on the job. It's not like anyone would check up on him, and there was nothing else better to do.

As time passed, he finally heard the door open, along with the little chime that rang through the store. Instead of looking up from his phone, Atsumu greeted the customer with a 'good morning'. He noticed the quiet shuffling of footsteps, the crumpling of snacks, and clanks from cold cans. But Atsumu noticed another set of footsteps, more sporadic than the other. The customer's voice was loud and hyper, a voice that he knew too well.

The customers were finally at the register, ready for purchase. "Atsumu," the one with black curly hair called out to him. Atsumu rubbed his eyes, trying with all his might to ignore his racing heart. "Hey, Omi-omi ~" he greeted with his signature lazy smirk.

"Omi-san! This one too."

Atsumu's brown orbs glanced towards the other's voice. The man of the hour, the man he's been trying to forget all along. He watched as the shorter of the two placed down an instant noodle cup. Such movements that made Atsumu almost scared to look up. He wasn't ready to see a cheerful smile upon his face, something he wished it was directed at him, for him to keep.

"Oh, hi Atsumu-san!"

Blinking, he tried to muster up the courage to at least say something. But for now, all he did was grab the goods they were buying. He carefully placed them in a plastic bag after checking them out, mumbling a 'here you go' as soon as he handed it to Sakusa. _God, when did I become so nervous?_

"Hey, Shouyou-kun," he finally said.

"Didn't know you worked here," Sakusa commented.

_Why are you making small talk?_

Atsumu chuckled, "Really? Thought you'd notice." The man shrugged at his response, clearly uninterested after his remark.

"I've never seen you work in the mornings though. Is it because of our new practice schedule?" Hinata asked further. Mentally, he grimaced, hoping that the two of them would leave. He'd hope that the ginger would shut his little mouth and eat his food already.

Atsumu nodded and hummed, having no energy to respond to such a question. It was easier for Atsumu to go to band practice without having to worry about work getting in the way. It's been a while since a proper meetup, and he didn't want to get in the way of it any longer.

The two boys made their way out of the store after a few exchanges of words. Talking about his new shift at the store, about the band and all. The faux-blonde slumped in his chair afterward, burnt out from such a tense and awkward atmosphere. It was normal though, for Atsumu to put up defenses around his ex-boyfriend.


	3. am

_18:06_

_Your sun-kissed face was alluring._

♫

"Don't forget your essay that's due a week from now," the professor reminded. The students quickly left the room, flooding the halls. Atsumu was amidst the sea of people, trying to leave as soon as possible. He was adjusting his bag before a hand grabbed him by the arm. His body tensed up as he whipped around to confront the culprit.

"Hey, what's the deal- " he started until his eyes met a familiar face. Rolling his eyes, he gripped his bag tighter. "For fuck's sake Samu, can't ya just call out my name?" the irritated male yelled. Atsumu just wanted to go home and eat his dinner- not like he knew how to make an exquisite meal, but at least he'll be satisfied for the night.

"I did, what's up your ass?" the other twin chuckled. The two of them started walking. "Will ya shut up?" Atsumu spat. "Woah. Chill, Tsumu," he started.

"I just came here so we can go look for Bokuto-san's gift."

_Well, there goes my peaceful night._

"Could've texted me," Atsumu grumbled before exiting the building. A wave of crispy cold air hit their faces as soon as they opened the door. Winter was approaching, yet it was colder than usual. His body shivered from the sudden change in temperature. The coat wasn't doing much for him.

"Well, you shouldn't be on your phone in class," he said after a while. Osamu stole a glance at his brother's shivering state. Lately, the silver-hair has been worried. Worried about his twin and his mental health. Atsumu hasn't been acting the same ever since Hinata and him broke up 6 months ago. It's been a long time, but to Atsumu, it felt like yesterday that the event had happened. Shrugging, Osamu averted his attention to the sidewalk.

"Ha, you're one to talk."

"By the way, do you have band practice tomorrow?" Osamu asked, ignoring the other's comment. He was curious due to the fact that the party was towards the evening, where it was intended to last all night long. Atsumu raised his eyebrow, not sure as to when his twin had ever asked about his own schedule. "Uh, no. Bokuto's party, remember?" he reminded the other. "Wow, then that's two days with no practice," he murmured under his breath.

"We're just busy. Practice resumes afterward anyway," he said. Atsumu brought his hands to his face, rubbing it together to create friction and heat despite the cold. "Hey, why are ya asking?" he asked. The golden-haired male put his hands back in his pockets as they approached the shopping center.

"I heard this concert venue was holding a new event 2 weeks from now."

"Didn't know ya keep track of those things," Atsumu remarked. Earlier, he had seen a flyer about it. Not to mention his band's group chat that a concert venue was being held soon. He assumed Osamu was talking about the same one that Bokuto asked about. The band was something that they did for fun, and they agreed to come together- along with Hinata and Sakusa since they all attended the same university.

"I haven't heard you guys played in a while. How long has it been?" the twin asked. They both stopped walking as soon as they saw a designer store; one that Bokuto has had his eyes on recently. Opening the heavy glass door, the two of them made their way in. An employee greeted them, reciting a sale that's happening for the entire store.

"I don't know, I think a month?" he questioned. All they've been doing was playing songs that they thought would need practice on. Other times, they'd play just for fun or if they wanted to hang out amongst themselves. They haven't been going to any gigs lately due to schedules being packed. However, Atsumu was fine now with the new job change.

"I'll talk about it with 'em tomorrow, I guess. But right now, what do we buy for Bokkun?" Atsumu changed the subject, not wanting to talk about something that wasn't occurring right now.

The store had intricate jackets, coats, and hoodies. There was a wide selection of jeans, cargo pants, and regular pants that followed the same color scheme as the tops. The designer's clothing contained black, gray, and white with a few accents of neon. A style that Bokuto's been interested in lately. "We can give him a new outfit, he's been telling me about this store," Atsumu suggested. His twin hummed in response, looking through the racks.

_Maybe I'll get matching hoodies with him._

After picking out different styles and varieties, Osamu gave up and followed Atsumu's lead. It took a while, but Atsumu pulled out two hoodies to show to his twin. One was black and the other was white, both having the same pattern of neon blue across the cloth. They both agreed that the blue would look good on him. The faux-blonde was finally relieved that they came to a decision and started to check out.

He knew that Bokuto liked it when he did stuff for both of them, and not just for him. It was sweet when the older told Atsumu; that holidays like tomorrow should be celebrated for his friends too. Well, he'd always directly say Atsumu's name.

♫

"Oi Tsumu, make sure you say it's from me too," Osamu told his brother, his hands tucked away in his jacket's pockets. They had arrived at Atsumu's place, currently outside and saying their farewells. "Yeah yeah, even though I did all the work," he pointed out while rolling his eyes. He fumbled for his keys, unlocking the door before he turned around to his twin. "But thanks for reminding me, I guess," he finished. It was no doubt that Atsumu would buy the gift last minute if it weren't for Osamu.

The silver-dyed was taken aback for a bit, his eyes widened from his twin's appreciation. Though, no other words were exchanged; Osamu didn't want to push it any further. He gave a smile of triumph, finally leaving the other by himself. Atsumu watched until he was no longer visible, the shopping bag clutched in his hands as he entered his safe space. Locking the door, he settled down his belongings before throwing himself on the couch.

He pulled out his phone to check the time. The clock read 21:38, knowing well he should've had dinner with Osamu. Atsumu thought it would be too much of a hassle. He just wanted to get home so that no one would bother him anymore.

The exhausted male struggled to put himself back on his feet. He had to prepare Bokuto's present before he forgets tomorrow. Knowing him, it was most likely that he'd forget to bring the present to the party. With sluggish footsteps, he made his way to his desk. His hands grabbed wrapping tissue and a sticker pack from years ago that he now had a purpose for.

_"Shouyou, where did ya get those gift stickers from?" the curious blonde asked. Hinata was currently wrapping up a present for his sister's Christmas present. Turning around, he looked to where Atsumu's eyes were._

_"Oh that? Just by the supermarket, there's a little stationery shop," he said before getting up from the floor and picking up the sticker packet. He peeled one off, knowing that his little sister liked flowers. "Buy some with me," Atsumu said, softly looking at the orange hair._

_"Nah, get some yourself!" he laughed._

_"Oi, come here," he jokingly demanded while he walked closer to the shorter._

_"No! I was joking- wait Atsumu-," Hinata got cut off by his boyfriend's tickling fingers, poking his sides. His giggles resonated in the room, with Atsumu joining the laughter as Hinata tickled him back._

Writing the words 'From Atsumu and Osamu', he closed the marker with the cap. He set aside the gift near the kitchen counter for him to easily spot in the morning.

Today wore himself out, especially with such an unfortunate conversation with Hinata and Sakusa. The thought of upcoming events made Atsumu dread the following weeks. He wished that he could stay in his room- where nothing could hurt him, where he didn't have to try to act like he was getting better. It was a lie though, his mind would torture him even in his sleep.


	4. lost

_19:47_

_The sun drifted farther away._

♫

_Atsumu's patience was wearing out by the minute. He was all dressed up in a light pink collared button-up shirt that compliments the black dress pants. However, he wasn't sure if it was going to be worth it if Hinata wasn't going to be home soon._

_Right now, he was waiting for Hinata in his car by his house. They had agreed that the older would pick them up for a dinner date. A date that Atsumu had been looking forward to- but Hinata wasn't home right now. He hadn't texted or called his boyfriend that he would be running late. He was worried that Hinata was lost or that someone had abducted him, but he remained calm. He needed to remain rational._

_The digital clock struck 20:00, 30 minutes after the scheduled reservation. Currently, he was ringing Hinata's phone for the tenth time before he looked up and spotted a blur of orange running inside the house. Trying to calm himself down, he got out of the car and made his way to the house. The door wasn't properly closed due to Hinata being in a hurry. He was thumping and stomping all over the place, stumbling on the rugged carpet and pieces of furniture. Atsumu watched the person in distress as the other disappeared in his room to change._

_While waiting once again, he sat on the couch. The house smelled just like Hinata; he tried to focus his senses on that for distraction. Atsumu's nerves were all over the place, hoping that the words he'd say wouldn't betray his struggling composure. Looking at his phone to check the time, several minutes had already passed, and he hoped he'd still be able to spend time with his boyfriend._

_Hinata closed his bedroom door before making his way to the living room. His clothes were neat- dress shirt tucked in, all the way buttoned up- despite rushing his way into them. His orange locks were still a spiky mess, swaying in every direction. He was breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling- in sync to the pounding headache that Atsumu had that was slowly increasing._

_He walked towards the door without giving a single glance to the irritated twin. Hinata's knuckles were white from clutching his phone too tightly. "Ok, let's go-"_

_"Where were you?" he interrupted him. He wanted an explanation first so that this situation wouldn't tug at his heartstrings. Atsumu hoped he didn't appear bitter, but the tone in his voice differed. Sure, they'd be late than before, but perhaps this talk would redeem that._

_Hinata's hand was already on the doorknob until he let go to turn around, facing his boyfriend for the first time that day. "With my friends," he gave a vague response, a response that Atsumu wasn't looking for. He already knew who from the moment the other's words left his tongue. He knew that it was probably just one friend. The golden hair still wanted to hear it from him though; he didn't feel like playing any games._

_"Who?" he asked. His heart was beating faster by the second, not sure if his anger will be contained any longer._

_"Kageyama."_

_"And?"_

_"Let's just go already," Hinata as he unlocked the entrance door. It was halfway opened when Atsumu grabbed his wrist. His blood was now boiling, confused and frustrated as to why the shorter couldn't admit the truth. He knew where this would lead to, wasting time on his own petty curiosity instead of driving._

_"You were with Kiyoomi, weren't you?" he assumed. Atsumu felt the younger stiffen before pulling away his wrist. It left a red mark, in which the faux-blonde didn't notice how tightly he gripped it._

_"And if I was?"_

_"You could've just told me instead of lying," his voice got louder. Hinata glared to the person in front of him. "You would always get mad if I said I was hanging out with him. That's why I don't tell you!" Hinata yelled at the other._

_Atsumu's frustration grew from his bitter words. He hated it, this feeling of agitation. "That's because you've been hanging out with him more than me lately, am I not allowed to be mad about that?" he spat, his final words cutting through his suppressed rage._

_"Am I not allowed to hang out with Kiyoomi-san? He's visiting and I just wanted to spend time with him but you're making it a bigger deal than it should be," Hinata fumed, tired of being blamed as soon as he got home._

_"Making it a bigger deal? Do you not know how long I've waited? I was looking forward to our date, hoping you'd be ready by the time I came over so that we'd spend quality time together- but no, you were hanging out with Kiyoomi that you lost track of time. Were you having that much fun without me? You didn't say anything to me, no texts, no calls, and now you even lied to me about being with him. For all I know, you could've been killed or something!" he exploded._

_His breath was erratic, his hands balled up in fists to stop him from shaking so much. Atsumu was now towering over him, giving Hinata a little scare from the expected outburst and thundering voice. All was silent; you can only hear their hearts racing, their heavy inhales and exhales._

_"I'm just worried," the older whispered. His eyes were glued to the floor, not wanting to see his boyfriend's disappointment. Atsumu felt Hinata's soft warm hands in his own, rubbing circles along the back of his hands._

_"I'm sorry," he mumbled, the words earnest and sincere._

_"I'm sorry too," the shorter responded. "Let's go eat now, ok?" his words soft and gentle than from before. Atsumu's eyes met Hinata's dark pools of brown; he didn't know his body was tense until he felt his shoulders relax. Nodding, they walked together to the car in silence._

♫

The autumn breeze woke Atsumu up from his sleep. He shifted in his seat, bumping his knees on the steering wheel. The sun was painting the sky with orange and purple, a perfect scenery for a picture. The car door was opened by none other than his twin. The faux-blonde sat up properly while wiping his eyes. He didn't notice he fell asleep in the car when he was waiting for Osamu.

"How long have you been here?" he questioned, buckling himself up in the shotgun seat. Atsumu turned the car on in the process; the steady rumble slowly brought him back to his senses. "Not long," he mumbled before stepping on the gas pedal.

Osamu turned on the aux chord, letting his phone play in shuffle. The silenced was filled with indie music and the sounds of the city. Currently, the twins were on their way to Bokuto's house. They wanted to be on time at least; the twins were famous for always being the last guests to arrive.

"Hey, did you include my name with the gift?"

"Nah," Atsumu joked. His sly smirk was plastered on his face when he saw Osamu scramble for the bag in the back seat. Soon enough, he received a slap from the back of his head for his jests.

"Ya little shit, I was messin' with ya," he growled, rubbing the painful spot. However, he received another punch on the arm.

"What was that for?"

"For calling me a little shit."

"That's because you are," he pressed.

"Oi! I was kiddin'!"

"Just shut up and drive before I hit you again," Osamu grumbled. The golden-hair said no more, focusing on the winding road ahead of them.

Soon enough, they arrived at their destination with ease. There were a few cars parked, but it wasn't too crowded. For once, they arrived on time and not an hour later. Atsumu grabbed the gift bag from the back seat before closing his car door. Osamu had already entered, greeting familiar faces and what not. Usually, Atsumu would go in and act like the party thrives on his energy. Though, this time, he entered the house with no big announcement that he was finally here.

The male spotted Osamu talking with Bokuto, his uplifting aura shining through the sea of bodies. Atsumu averted his gaze to scan the area, seeing old and new faces in the crowd. There were people from highschool too, like Suna and Kita. He even saw people from the training camp back in his second year, Kageyama and Hoshiumi. Fortunately for him, he hasn't seen the short ginger yet.

Suddenly, he heard the ever so energetic voice boom across the whole house. "Hey hey hey, TsumTsum!" Atsumu cringed from the greeting- all eyes were on him, laughing and teasing at his reaction. "Do ya have to be so loud, Bokkun?" he growled.

"That's no way to treat the birthday boy!" he cheered while slinging his arm around the annoyed male. "Yeah yeah, happy birthday. Here's your gift." Atsumu shoved the bag into Bokuto's arms, which he happily opened right away. If it were possible, Bokuto's facial expression lightened even more once he saw the contents in the bag. Atsumu decided to give him the white version; himself having the black one.

"Aww thanks, TsumTsum! I've been wanting one!" he smiled widely. He hummed in response, a soft chuckle escaping his lips. "I got us matching ones," the blonde added. Bokuto gasped, begging Atsumu to match with him the next day.

The night went on, the party became more chaotic as people joined in the fanatics. They were all huddled in the living room, playing a drinking game right after dinner. The cake wasn't until later, for when all the guests have arrived. Only Hinata and Sakusa were arriving later than usual.

Atsumu couldn't drink much, since he was driving back home. Although Bokuto suggested he can sleep the night here, the golden hair didn't want to bother anyone- and he knew that others would sleep over. He only had a shot of tequila before calling it quits. Sitting down on a stool, he watched the others pay 'Never Have I Ever', and some statements weren't very appropriate.

"Never have I ever had a one night stand," Kuroo smirked. All except for one drank his cup, not surprised that Daishou was the sinner. The bunched screamed and laughed as the snake-like male glared at all of them, even if he was the one to embarrass himself.

Suddenly, the door bell rang. No one paid attention as the sound got drowned once again by laughter and curse words. Atsumu turned his head around towards the door, stepping down on the stool to inform Bokuto.

"Bokkun, someone's at the door," he called. Bokuto told the others to keep playing as he stumbled his way over with Atsumu to the door. The taller male wasn't that drunk yet, but enough for him to have trouble opening the door. Atsumu sighed and did it for him, only to be met by the other two members of the band, the ones who were fashionably late.

"Bokuto-san!"

"Shouyou!"

The two jumped at each other to hug, leaving a tired Atsumu and a cringing Sakusa to the side.

"What took ya both so long?" he asked, trying to seem somewhat social. It bothered him that they came together, but he tried not to show his growing annoyance."This idiot wanted to buy a million gifts for Bokuto," Sakusa glared at the shorter. Hinata gave a sheepish smile. After saying that, Atsumu noticed the amount of bags both of them were holding. It wasn't as much as the blonde thought, but it was a lot compared to what the others brought.

As the three conversed, the blonde couldn't help but stare at Hinata. He was dressed in an oversized white hoodie. The collar of his polo shirt was sticking out for the lack of warmth around his neck. He wore black skinny jeans along with a pair of high top converse. His entire outfit screamed comfy. For a second, their eyes met. Atsumu quickly looked at his feet, heat rising in his cheeks.

_He's cute._

Atsumu mentally shook his head. After welcoming the both of them inside, Hinata encouraged Bokuto to open the presents they bought for him. He noticed the amount of figurines and clothes the birthday boy had just received. Both Hinata and Bokuto geeked about the latest models until Sakusa gave his one gift. They were new drum sticks, colored with gold and black patterns.

"Oh damn, these are cool!" Bokuto said as he examined them in awe. The germaphobe rolled his eyes despite having the corners of his lips slightly curled. A few others who were playing the drinking game came over to see what the excitement was about, their drunken states exaggerating their actions.

"Yeah! You can use them when the concert happens!" Hinata chimed in.

"Right, are we makin' a new song?" Atsumu asked the three of them. They all looked each other in agreement and nodded.

"Ohhh, Omi-Omi, are you writing the song?" Bokuto slurred as he glanced between Hinata and Sakusa.

"Uh, I was thinking that maybe Atsumu would write it this time."

"What? But you could be writing a love song!" Bokuto whined. Hinata's and Sakusa's eyes widened, not ready for what was about to happen next. The faux-blonde's lazy smirk left his face, a confused expression now plastered on.

"No, Bokuto-san, it's ok we'll-" Hinata started but got cut off by the drunk one.

"But what about writing a song about you two dating? You guys are so cute togetherrrr-" he bragged before a hand covered his mouth. Akaashi had overheard their conversation and tried his best to stop Bokuto from spilling anything else. "Sorry Atsumu, he's just tipsy right now," he half-lied.

It was too late, however. Atsumu looked at Hinata and Sakusa for confirmation. Their expressions told him that the drunken male wasn't lying. That the two of them were officially together, without him knowing. The music muffled as if he was underwater, the voices of his drunk peers zoned out. His heart beat was so loud and agonizing; unable to control the irregular noises.

Atsumu didn't know why he was surprised. He knew it was coming from a mile away. He knew that eventually the two of them would get together and be happy without him. That Hinata would learn to love another- that their past love would become memories. But he didn't know why he felt hurt and betrayed. He didn't like how easily the other had moved on. He didn't like that he was the only one hurting. Atsumu felt betrayed that the two of them found each other when he was struggling day and night to feel at least something else other than misery.

"For how long?" his tongue felt dry, his words harsh. Atsumu only received silence from the two. They didn't want him to find out like this, especially when he was still healing from the moment Hinata broke up with him. Especially when Sakusa and Atsumu were beginning to be best friends- and especially when they were supposed to be having fun and celebrating their fellow band member's birthday.

"How long?!" Atsumu repeated, the blood in his veins churning.

"A month," Sakusa answered, his voice unwavered.

_A month, a fucking month without me knowing._

Atsumu clenched his fists, not trusting himself for lashing out on either of them, or anyone for that matter. Osamu's hand gripped his twin's shoulder tightly, a warning that he should calm down. "Tsumu, we're going home, c'mon," he claimed.

"No, we're not," he started. Giving one last glare at the couple, he turned around and headed for the living room.

"I'm drinking tonight."


	5. in

_13:17_

_The clouds hid the sun away._

♫

Atsumu awoke to the sound of rummaging of closing and opening drawers. His eyes were half-lidded; the sun filtering out through the thick curtains and window. He had noticed this wasn't his place, and he could make out the moving blur from across the room. Sitting up, the pounding headache from the moment he woke up intensified. The faux-blonde gripped his head in pain, groaning while doing so.

"Oh you're up!" the other male in the room noticed. He put on a brand new t-shirt, throwing one for Atsumu in the process.

It softly hit the other, not phased as his mind was too occupied in trying to understand his surroundings. "Bokkun?" he hesitated before his eyes had finally adjusted. The taste of alcohol remains on his tongue. He vaguely remembered last night, and he wasn't sure why he stayed the night.

"Yup, that's me. Go shower, you reek of alcohol," Bokuto suggested. Atsumu rolled his eyes, only to regret it later as his headache picked up once again. With no energy fighting back, the male stumbled his way to the bathroom. However, the headache was relentless; it was difficult for him to stand up straight, let alone walk another step. Bokuto was there right away to catch Atsumu before he fell on his side. He groaned in annoyance.

"How much did I drink last night?" he grimaced as they both walked to the bathroom. The cold tile floors proved numb at his feet and the blinding lights made his nausea even worse. The other had chuckled, not surprised by Atsumu's inability to function.

"And why the fuck aren't ya wasted like me?" he complained as the contents from last night spilled into the toilet bowl. Bokuto recoiled at the grotesque seen in front of him as he soothed his back. After some time, the older grabbed a paper towel to wipe Atsumu's face, his cheeks stained with tears. He coughed from the lack of air as Bokuto patted his back a couple of times.

Atsumu felt disgusting and weak, trying to remember the events from what happened the night before. Though, his headache prevented such thoughts for now.

"You drank my whole bottle of vodka. I told you, TsumTsum-" he started.

_What the fuck._

"- that you'd suffer the consequences in the morning."

_Yeah, no shit._

Bokuto decided it was best to undress his helpless friend until he knew it was time for him to leave. Atsumu winced as he lifted his arms, the older taking off the shirt. Near his ribs, there was a forming blue, purple, and yellow hue. The golden-hair eyed his body in the mirror, not believing what he was seeing. He glanced at Bokuto for answers, not bothering to use his voice to ask a question.

"SamuSamu had difficulty carrying you upstairs. You rammed your side on the wall thinking it was marshmallows," he explained. Atsumu glared at the drummer for smiling on the spot.

"Is he still here?" he asked.

"No, Suna took him home."

Atsumu nodded, suddenly curious about what time it was now. His eyes widened as he realized he could be late for work. "Shit, my shift- What time is it?" he panicked, unbuckling his belt not paying attention that his best friend was with him. Bokuto's cheeks dusted with red, turning around for him to have privacy. Clearing his throat, he spoke. "Samu told your boss that you were sick, it's ok."

The male sighed in relief until he realized the situation he was in; his pants off, his hands were already tugging at his boxers. Embarrassed, he shooed Bokuto away, to which the other laughed it off.

After throwing up once more, the hangover was getting a bit better. His heart wasn't as he recalled what had led him to drink so much in the first place. His hands gripped the metallic knob, turning it for the right temperature. The water trickled down his back, washing away the stench of remaining alcohol. He was careful enough not to disturb the newly formed bruise. His hair darkened to a honey-like color, his fingers lathering and combing it away from his face.

_So they're dating, huh?_

The male shook his head. Atsumu’s heartbeat already started beating faster at the mention of his ex-boyfriend and friend being together. Now that he knew, it was obvious from the way he always saw them together- in campus, during his shift, during band practice, and how they came to Bokuto's party. Of course the two were dating. He just wished he grasped the situation sooner and better.

His emotions were a storm, thunderous waves that churned violently in his heart. He wasn't sure what he was feeling, but something along the lines of betrayal, anger, and frustration seemed close to it. The fact that the two hid it from him for so long made him want to do unforgivable things. Knowing that others had already known about it, and knowing that he was probably the last one to be told struck a chord in his heart. It wasn't even the plan to tell him at all last night; his tipsy best friend just so happened to blurt out the inevitable.

Stepping out of the shower, the headache that subsided resurfaced once again. Thinking too much of last night brought him in this mess, and he was willing to do anything than to pay up for it.

A set of new clothes were placed on the counter, the shirt and jeans being a bit too loose for his body. He reminded himself to apologize to Bokuto for probably crashing his party and the trouble he caused. Atsumu hoped he didn't say anything to the 'new' couple, anything that would notify his bitterness for them.

The living room was spotless compared to what it was last night. The rugs and couches were orderly, not a single paper plate or red plastic cup in sight. Atsumu assumed for the older to be in the kitchen- and that too, was clean.

"So who helped tidy the place?" he asked, sitting down on a stool. He propped up his elbow on the table with his chin resting on his hand. Bokuto's broad back was facing him, preparing some fried egg and rice at 2 in the afternoon.

"Me, of course," Bokuto grinned.

"Ye right."

"And Akaashi and Konoha," he added.

The two toned-hair had 2 plates in his hand, the other for Atsumu. He mumbled a small thanks before picking up the chopsticks and poking at the scrambled eggs. Bokuto had grabbed water bottles before sitting down next to his best friend. As Atsumu was stuffing his mouth with the newly cooked food, Bokuto would show him funny videos from instagram on his phone.

Scrolling further down his home feed, there was a sponsored post about the Bamboo Rock venue. The laughter that once filled the room diminished. Atsumu adjusted in his seat, stabbing his eggs while mixing it with the rice. Bokuto gave a quick glance at the irritated other.

"Are you going to write the song?" he hesitated.

That was right, Sakusa suggested that he write the new song. Atsumu wasn't sure what the reason behind it was, but he was willing to accept it. It's not like he couldn't say no; Hinata and Bokuto could write it but they were better at compositions than song writing. He brought his food to his mouth to delay his answer. Slowly chewing to give some thought on what to say. In the end, he overthought too much of it and gave a simple answer.

"Yeah."

Bokuto raised his eyebrow, his full attention now on the latter.

"What are you writing about, TsumTsum?" he asked. He knew it would be about love, but it was hard to know if Atsumu would write something personal. Atsumu could make a made up fantasy story about romance, a love that he hadn't experienced- but it would sound believable. The role of being the main vocalist carries that weight of showing off his emotions poured into a song within a few minutes. He also played the electric guitar, but now he has to write a song.

He contemplated on the topic, if it was appropriate to even voice his heart- or if he'd just let the opportunity go. Atsumu wasn't even sure how he'd start. So far, he believed listening to the band would aid in his song writing.

"I'm not sure," he truthfully answered. With his emotions haywire, it was almost impossible to write down lyrics that would express himself. Bokuto nodded in response; he decided it was best if he didn't push the topic onto him. The older's once beaming smile was replaced with a thoughtful expression. He really wished Atsumu to feel better, he wished that he would move on- but he knows it'll take some time. Atsumu was deeply in love with Hinata after all.

"We have practice in a few hours," Bokuto reminded. The faux-blonde's reaction was expected- with a heavy sigh and clenched fists, it didn't look like he was ready to face the couple again.

"You can join us tomorrow, then."

Atsumu silently nodded to that. Today, he needed to breathe. He didn't think it was a great idea for him to see the two of them together. He was afraid he'd yell at them, and any feud within a band should be solved- just not in an intrusive way.


	6. time

_16:25_

_The sun scorched my land._

♫

The two band members arrived at Atsumu's apartment as the sun hung low in the sky. They both discussed that Bokuto would stay the night with him after he's finished with practice. As much as the blonde had said he was doing fine, the older managed to persuade him with a deal that he'd buy them food afterwards. Without much hesitation, Atsumu finally said yes. Besides, it wouldn't hurt having his best friend over to spend some time with.

"I'll be back around 8:30 then, is that too late for dinner?" Bokuto asked. Atsumu had already stepped out of the car, picking up his belongings beforehand. He shrugged in response, closing the door behind him.

"I don't mind, as long as I have food."

"Great! I'll see ya later, TsumTsum!"

With that, the cheerful male drove off. Atsumu hoped Bokuto wouldn't crash his car that he let him borrow- but he has enough trust in him that he wouldn't do anything stupid. The moment he stepped inside his abode, the lonelier he felt. It was too quiet, as if something wasn't right, that something was missing. He's lived alone here ever since he started college, but he's always had visiters- invited or uninvited.

Usually, Osamu would stop by so they could catch up despite both of them wanting to go their separate ways. They didn't want to admit it but the twins do miss each other from time to time. And other times, it would be Sakusa and Bokuto. Sakusa would come over when their early afternoon class was over. They would hang out and play video games or just sleep until band practice hours began. Bokuto would tag along sometimes and the two wouldn't mind. Atsumu would ask Bokuto if he could drop him off at his work if he was running late.

Hinata would come over every chance he gets. Being in his final year of highschool, he was very busy. The third-year would be forced to study at home or with his group of friends that he had in his highschool. However, Atsumu's weekends would always revolve around Hinata. They spent every hour together until the younger had to go home. The both of them felt like the weekends alone weren't enough, hence they started the band.

♫

_"Why am I here?" the tallest asked._

_Hinata had called Sakusa and Bokuto to Atsumu's apartment regardless of his boyfriend's disagreement. The blonde had to sit back and watch it all unfold unless he didn't want to see Hinata for the rest of the week._

_"Hear me out, ok? Listen, Bokuto-san, you play the drums right?" the youngest asked, practically jumping on his feet._

_Bokuto gave a mighty laugh, intrigued by the ginger's random question. "Indeed I do, ever since I was young!" he beamed in delight. Sakusa eyed the two as if they were crazy, confused as to what was unraveling before him. Atsumu only shrugged, leaving the curly hair to understand the situation himself._

_Hinata cheered in awe, nodding excitedly before remembering his next question. "Ah right, Omi-san can play the bass guitar, right? Right?" Sakusa nodded which Atsumu and Bokuto were taken aback. They have never heard him play an instrument in his life, so hearing this now was worthwhile._

_"And Atsumu can play the guitar!"_

_"Electric," the faux-blonde pointed out._

_"The electric guitar!" Hinata added._

_Ever since Atsumu and Osamu watched videos online, the twins decided to pick up an instrument that interested them the most. The silver-hair had lost interest in playing the keyboard, but Atsumu has practiced the electric guitar for years now. He still finds enjoyment in it; he never took a break from learning new songs and making songs of his own. Atsumu was never expressive about showing his talent to others since he only saw it as a hobby._

_"And?" Sakusa asked, not sure what he was getting at._

_"And I play the electric guitar too!"_

_"But what does that have to do with anything?"_

_"Omi-san, it means we can be a band!" The ginger finally got his point across. Bokuto was very much entertained at the sudden idea of starting a band. Atsumu has thought the idea was crazy. He didn't understand the purpose of it if they weren't going to become serious in the end. Although the younger had claimed it was just for fun, he wasn't sure if there would be time on his hand, let alone the other guys. Sakusa just became more confused; Hinata wasn't the best at explaining his reasons but he needed one as to how the shorter came to that conclusion._

_"Uh, what?" the curly hair asked in bewilderment._

_"Woah! Four of us in a band, I'm down," Bokuto gushed in approval. The oldest didn't see any harm in doing it, and it sounded fun to him at least. Atsumu rolled his eyes, even though he already knew he would agree to such a plan._

_"Even if we decided to make a band, we don't have a vocalist," Sakusa claimed. The twin's eyes widened as he glanced at his boyfriend, ready to spill whatever he had his hands on. He should've seen it miles away from when Hinata walked in on him singing a new song he just learned how to play. The younger wouldn't stay put as if he was ready to tell the whole world about Atsumu's new profound talent. It seemed like he was going to start with these two._

_"TsumTsum can sing? I've never heard him!" Bokuto wondered, eager to hear the embarrassed blonde. Atsumu profusely shook his head, not even sure if he actually sounded good. Sure, he's boasted many times of his talent in volleyball, in his fashion, and his looks- but he never once mentioned anything music related. For some reason, he wasn't as confident since no one was their to witness him play and sing._

_"Hey, Atsumu, sing," Sakusa stated, as if it were a demand rather than a request._

_"I can't sing," he stubbornly lied._

_Hinata jabbed his sides, in which the older fell over from the jolt of pain. "Yes you can! I heard you yesterday!"_

_"I'm not approving this band thing until I hear you," he remarked, crossing his arms while ignoring Bokuto and Hinata's excessive gasps._

_"Well I guess we won't be a band then-"_

_"Atsumu, please? Sing for us, I promise you sound great," Hinata pleaded, alongside with the older. Atsumu looked into those brown pools of his, making it harder for him to refuse._

_"Don't be nervous! Do it for Shouyou-kun!" Bokuto exclaimed._

_He glared at the two. "I'm not nervous! Shut up ya two," the twin growled._

_"Oh just sing already," Sakusa said, rolling his eyes._

_The once rough voice turned into a soothing but powerful one. A ballad was sung, his throat swelling up with notes both low and high. It echoed and bounce between the walls, reaching the ears of the others. It was unordinary for Atsumu to look at peace as his voice manifested the emotions at the bottom of his heart. Flowing ever so gracefully, you can hear hints of his huskiness mixed in. It played a beautiful untrained melody._

_The room was silent once Atsumu was finished as his nerves were feral. Hinata was smiling uncontrollably, grasping his boyfriend's hands in his own. Bokuto's jaw dropped, amazed at his unexpected talent._

_"What the fuck, you can sing?" the tallest asked with a puzzled tone._

_"What did I tell you guys? He's great," Hinata gushed, the two hand in hand. Atsumu blushed, trying to pry his hand off of the other while Bokuto slumped an arm around his shoulder. At this point, he gave up at the physical touch and let the two be. "Oi, TsumTsum, sing me a lullaby to sleep tonight ~ " he teased further._

_"So, so? Can we start the band?" Hinata asked once again, seeing if anyone has changed their minds. Sakusa only shrugged, a sign that he'll just go along with it. The three looked at Atsumu anticipating his answer._

_"Yeah, yeah."_

♫

The singer hooked up his electric guitar to the amplifier. It's been a while the last time he had played, but a couple of weeks shouldn't do damage to his memory. Earlier, Bokuto discussed with the couple that Atsumu should find his rhythm first. That way, the rest can add on without any hindrance during practice if the golden-hair couldn't be there.

For a while, Atsumu has had a melody stuck in his head. He recorded it of course and it was time to figure out the chords. The first pluck thrived, the sound resonating in his room. It gave him chills as the familiar vibration was ready to pump through his body. Finally, a single strum turned into a beat. With each strumming pattern, it was mapped out with consideration. From the timing of his melody to the solos and riffs, he tried his best to make sure it would satisfy himself and the others.

He really wished that he could have the courage and just go to practice without causing any trouble for the rest of the band. However, the twin couldn't force it- it was almost impossible for him to act like everything has been ok. Even now, the new tune created Atsumu's head was faltering, and he tried to at least work with what he has before a single push would knock him over the edge. It was already hard for him picking up the guitar; he found himself hopeless talking to Sakusa and Hinata.

Right as he finished the last piece of the composition, the doorbell rung. The blonde lost track of time; he glanced at the clock while making his way to the apartment door only to be greeted by the smell of food. As his stomach rumbled, Atsumu quickly opened the door with a smirking owl.

"Your savior has arrived, now step aside~" Bokuto announced with the plastic bags of freshly cooked food in his hands. With a lazy slide to the left, the older made his way in as he put the food on the counter.

"Now what do you say?"

"Did ya get fatty tuna?"

"Wrong, it's thank you!" he laughed, opening up the contents of the bag and digging in right away. Atsumu chuckled, giving a 'thank you' to the older and joining him on his awaited meal. The two ate with comfortable silence; Bokuto often bringing up how he liked the twin's car and wanting to drive it again. They never mentioned the band nor the song as if it was the last thing to worry about. Tonight was just them to spend their time together, and to make up what time they had loss from before. And to that, Atsumu was grateful the other didn't push him further into explaining how he felt. It was better that way to him, hoping that Bokuto wouldn't get mixed up in some romance drama.


	7. 'cause

_10:28_

_i waited for the sun to greet me._

♫

The tired college student sighed, trying to ignore Bokuto's laughter in the corner of the store. He observed from afar, noticing details he's never seen before. The way the older's nose scrunches up when he laughs, the raised sleek eyebrows, and the tuff of dark grey that wasn't gelled in place. Atsumu had nothing better to do but stare, waiting on customers to buy their snacks and drinks.

He tried to persuade him not to come with him to work; he found it ridiculous that Bokuto would wait here until his early afternoon class started. In the end, the persistent one won and if Atsumu were honest, he didn't actually mind. In fact, he was grateful that the older had looked out for him for the past week. Bokuto would stay over everyday and talk about anything other than the night at his birthday party. The younger felt spoiled- he felt like it was finally time to go to practice. Atsumu had a lot of catching up to do after a whole week of sulking.

The little chime at the front door caught the faux-blonde's attention. They were two local highschool students skipping school. As the two conversed, Bokuto walked up to the register counter.

"What, Bokkun?"

"Here look, it's funny, trust me," Bokuto said with a stupid grin. Atsumu's been sighing a lot lately, the reason was mostly because of his extroverted best friend. With his eyes glancing between the customers and the phone screen, he didn't exactly give an expression that Bokuto wanted, therefore replaying it once again.

"Oi, pay attention, TsumTsum!" he whined. The older flicked his head lightly before following his eyes to where Atsumu was looking.

"You're too young to buy those, guys," Atsumu claimed from behind the counter, not impressed at the irresponsible teenagers. The two had bottles of beer in their hands. Although, it hasn't been a long time where he was underage drinking as well. Usually, he wouldn't care if he weren't the employee here- and even though he was finally the age to drink, he drank way too much at a certain outing. For now, he's been wary of alcohol.

"Are you even old enough to work here?" one of the boys remarked. Atsumu's temper was flipped on like a switch, irked at the younger's words. Bokuto wasn't helping, holding back a snicker when he should be supporting him.

"Hey, I'm older than both of ya!" he yelled while slapping the older's arm. "and I won't let ya purchase that, buy somethin' else!" The highschoolers grumbled, shoving the beer back into its original place. It was flattering at least, to say that the blonde looked younger than what he really was.

Bokuto was rubbing where the short-tempered male hit him. "Did you have to hit me that hard?"

"It wasn't even that hard," he rolled his eyes, his attention now on the phone as the video replayed once more.

The customers finally walked up to the two with different drinks in their hands. Lifting up a pack of milk cartons and several snacks onto the counter, Atsumu went right to work. He felt the stares in front of him, wondering what the deal was with these two. As he scanned the last snack, he bagged them up while telling the price.

"Hey, aren't you two the ones who performed last time at the East Shore venue?" one of them spoke after a while. The other gave the money to Atsumu, sorting it out before giving the change.

"Ohoh, you know us? Yeah, we were there!" Bokuto beamed, suddenly interested in the conversation. It was a little over a month ago where the band decided to perform on stage. It wasn't their first time, but it was still nerve-wracking. Sakusa still hated it, but he performed better than they all expected. In the end, the crowd loved their songs and hoped for more in the future. Atsumu's voice was complimented as well; he was somewhat embarrassed at the compliments, but he only showed his pride and confidence.

"Are you going to perform soon again?" he asked, grabbing the plastic bag.

"In a week, but a different place called the Bamboo Rock," Atsumu answered. He guessed that even in this city, there were a few that would recognize them. They signed up for bigger venue- and a bigger venue meant more people. Sakusa was against it for a while, believing that the old one was fine already- however he finally gave in after some time.

"Oh sweet, we'll be there. Have a nice day," waving goodbye, they left the store. The two band members sat there trying to process what really happened.

"Are they fans?" Bokuto asked the other, to which he mumbled a small 'maybe'.

"Anyway, I had to show you something, I forgot!" the older said, rummaging his hand inside his bag before pulling out his laptop. In his other hand, there was flash drive. Bokuto turned on his laptop, inputting the password, and finally inserting the flash drive to the slot. Atsumu just hoped he wouldn't get in trouble for this- having his friend tag along and all.

Bokuto opened up a file and letting it play for itself. It was a recording of Atsumu's composition, but the bass and another set of an electric guitar were added to it. The singer was engrossed into the song, satisfied that the others added their own little spice to it but it sounded well together. The two things missing were the drums and the vocals; he figured that Bokuto was going to record the drums tonight.

"So what do you think?"

"It's good, are ya recording at home?"

"I was planning on doing it in the practice room," the drummer confirmed. Atsumu nodded in understanding, his mind wandering off to might what happen when he goes to practice today. It would be a full week since the blonde had confronted the two. He never answered their calls and texts, thinking it was best to figure out what was going on his mind rather than thinking illogically for once. Bokuto assured that their song was going well, even though it was kind of hard with the main vocalist not being there. It was harder since the song was new, and technically only Atsumu knew the whole thing.

The older eyed Atsumu, a small smile appearing on his face. He was glad that the twin was doing better than before. Bokuto wouldn't say he was finally moving on, Atsumu was far from that considering they've never talked once about them unless it was about the concert.

"Bokkun," Atsumu began.

His eyes adjusted, focusing on reality. Taking out the flash drive, Bokuto hummed to show that he was paying attention. The younger opened his mouth to speak, but closed it in hesitation. He was unsure why he asked it, or why he wanted to know the answer.

"How did ya know about Shouyou-kun and Omi-kun?"

Atsumu's words surprised the other. He found it odd that he was asking this now, and he wondered if it was really ok to talk about it even if the twin was the one who brought it up first. There was a moment of silence between them, in case one or the other decided it was best not to talk about it anymore. Bokuto got the cue after a while, not wanting to drag on the tension for too long.

"It was during practice while we were on break. I caught them kissing when you went out to go get a drink from the vending machine," the owl-like male explained. Running a hand through his two-toned hair, he nervously laughed.

"They told me not to tell you, and I didn't think it was right for me to."

Atsumu was calmer than expected. It was enough for him to understand his story, he just didn't like how it was kept a secret for way longer than he'd like.

"-but I told you when I was drunk. I'm sorry TsumTsum," he finished.

"It's fine, I'm glad ya did, though. Sorry for causing trouble at your party too."

Bokuto laughed at his apology, brushing it off as nothing. "Don't worry about it, it was fun!" Atsumu chuckled, glad that part of the mess was out of the way. Looking at the clock, it was time for the older to leave. They both said their farewells, promising to see each other at practice this evening. The faux-blonde was left alone in the store, humming the new song's tune in his head. He didn't come up with lyrics yet even if the concert was in a week. He had hoped his creativity would pop up by now, looking at poems and different songs that could inspire him- but to no avail, there was nothing.

♫

The singer stood there anxiously in front of the music store. The familiar foreground didn't help his nerves. People stared as they walked, whispering if he was alright. Atsumu was early actually, a bit too early. He didn't want to walk in and see Hinata and Sakusa already there, and Bokuto was taking too long to get ready. It was much preferred to test out his guitar before the others had arrived.

With his hands clutching his guitar case strap tightly, he finally walked inside. He asked the cashier for the keys to the usual room. The room had the usual smell of antique metal and mist rose. It was arranged the same way it was the last time Atsumu was here, the drum sets at the back, the amps at the left side, it was like another home to the four of them. There were many great memories- some chaotic ones, but nevertheless, they all cherished such a small place.

He placed his case down, unzipping it to reveal his electric guitar colored with black and glossy gold that matched his hair. The strings were fairly new; Atsumu just needed to tune it correctly and test out the sound. Grabbing his guitar pick and cable, he plugged it into the amp speaker. It took some time to tune it, but after a few tries, the singer was able to strum away.

Bokuto had arrived a few moments later; the golden-hair was grateful for him coming sooner than expected. The older decided to show Atsumu the drums before the rest came. With its upbeat rhythm, the singer was pleased with the results. They ended up recording it with enough time to spare. All that was left was to record his vocals, hoping he would make it in time.

The door knob jingled, catching the attention of the two band members in the room. Atsumu's heart picked up, his eyes widening as he restlessly waited for the door to open. He felt the warmth of Bokuto's hand placed on his, giving it a squeeze of reassurance. He squeezed his hand back as a thank you, ready for the unknown future.

"Hey guys!" the expressive ginger greeted, his guitar cased placed neatly on his back.

"Hello," Sakusa mumbled as they both gave a small bow.

Bokuto made his way to the two, giving his signature 'hey hey hey' that boomed through the whole room. Atsumu gave a wave with a small hey, trying his best not to seem awkward once again.

"I recorded the drums, by the way," Bokuto claimed, letting the other two hear it as they settled their bags down.

"Aww yay, it's coming together now!" Hinata cheered. The tallest nodded with approval. Atsumu was glad that the others played along with it, but the pressure was on now that they were all waiting for the lyrics.

"Shall we practice it for the first time together?" Bokuto asked, glancing at the other 3 band members. The oldest made his way to the drum sets, grabbing the wooden sticks placed on the set. The adrenaline was finally kicking in, feeling the new surge through his fingers. Atsumu awaited for the drum sticks signals. And for the first time, he made eye contact with both Hinata and Sakusa. The four nodded as they all smiled.

"Three, two, one-"


	8. this

_19:48_

_the sun called out my name._

♫

The practice that Atsumu spent at home suddenly meant nothing in his time of need. He expected it of course, that nothing would go smoothly for the first time. However, there was a second, then third, and then many more tries- but Atsumu still couldn't get these strumming patterns right. In his eyes, a week away shouldn't have hindered this much progress, and he swore to them that he's been doing his part.

The singer sighed, repositioning his fingers to the second fret. He really wanted to get this part right- it didn't matter how long it would take, but it frustrated him to no end that this wasn't going the way he wanted it to be.

The others noticed the displeased looks on Atsumu’s face every time he made a mistake. They’d notice his tense shoulders and unbalancing posture. They can hear the little grumbled and muffled curse words that spew out of his mouth. They can hear the hums here and there instead of intricate words.

As Atsumu plucked the metal colored silver strings, his fingers misplaced on the wrong fret. It gave off a brassy and sharp sound that echoed off the walls of the music room. Both Hinata and Sakusa stopped playing, cringing at the unpleasant sound in their ears. Bokuto stilled his drum’s cymbals, worriedly glancing at the struggling singer.

The faux-blonde’s head hung low, his dark orbs becoming dull every time he got a chord wrong. His calloused fingers let go of the instrument, his arms slumped on his sides. He was losing his temper, his shaky breaths filling the gap of silence. Atsumu swallowed the frustrated yell that was going to erupt any moment.

“Sorry, let's start over-”

“It's fine, let's take a break for now,” Sakusa interrupted, slinging the guitar strap off over his shoulder. Hinata did the same, hoping it would at least calm the singer down.

“Are ya sure? I think I’ll get it this time,” he hesitated, his eyes holding uncertainty.

“Atsumu-san, we have a week and I'm sure you'll get it down by then!” Hinata cheered on. The ginger felt guilty- he knows that him and his new relationship was probably the reason for Atsumu’s miserable state. He knows he’s hurt him that he would believe to be the worse way possible.

Bokuto walked over to the blonde, grabbing him by his hand. Atsumu looked between the three and slowly nodded, taking off the guitar strap as he set down his guitar. He didn't understand why things weren't going his way. He swore that he had been doing his part and that he made sure he’s done every pattern correctly when he was practicing on his own.

_So why can't I do it here?_

“TsumTsum and I are going to get some drinks, what do you guys want?” Bokuto asked, his foot halfway out the door. The curly hair shook his head, showing a water bottle in his hand.

“Tea!” the shorter yelled, to which Bokuto gave a thumbs up.

They both left the room as they were looking out for a green vending machine. However, the older of the two dragged them outside into the cityscape. Atsumu’s hand was still holding onto the other, following closely behind in confusion. He kept quiet, watching if there was something that was needed to be said. Knowing his best friend, the elephant that was in the room wouldn't be brought up directly.

It was a short walk but they ended up at another vending machine. The cold air was almost sweet and caressing; it swayed through the sidewalk trees and bushes. Atsumu’s swept hair blew gently across his face as he stared at Bokuto.

“Why are we here?” the faux-blonde asked.

“There was no Pocari Sweat in the other one.”

Atsumu slightly tilted his head, “Ya don't really drink that though.”

“I know, but you do,” Bokuto claimed, giving a bright smile as he punched the buttons in for it. Atsumu chuckled, surprised from his sudden observational skills. It was amusing to him how warm he felt despite the chilly breeze.

He caught the bottle in his hands once the older threw it towards him. It felt cool in his hands, the condensed water already dripping slowly. The blonde gave a sip as the light grapefruit flavor filled his taste buds; it calmed down his temper, easing his mind while at it. Bokuto walked over to Atsumu, his hands occupied by his own drink and Hinata’s.

“Feeling better?”

Atsumu gave a small nod, walking side by side with the owl-like male. They headed back to the music store in hopes that they’d make more progress than before. As Atsumu was ready to open the door, Bokuto grabbed his attention by gripping his shoulder. The blonde looked back, his hand leaving the door knob. There was a gleam in the other’s eyes.

“What?”

“Just do what you usually do, don't mind them,” the older suggested.

The words felt more reassuring coming from him than his own mind- and with that, Atsumu and Bokuto returned to practice. The couple turned their heads at the sudden sound, standing up from the wooden stools. Hinata took out the earbud from his ear, handing it over to his boyfriend who held it and put it away in dismay. They were too close for Atsumu's liking; it would be wrong of him to act jealous when the ginger wasn't his anymore.

“Here Shouyou!” Bokuto called. Almost dropping the drink, Hinata gave a 'thank you' to the drummer.

Making his way back to his guitar, Atsumu mindlessly plucked at a string. The blonde placed down his drink by his stool, his hands warming up from the numbing sensation from before. "What were ya listenin' to?" he asked, glancing back at them.

"Oh, it was our new song!" Hinata exclaimed.

"What for?"

Sakusa put on his guitar strap once again, testing its sound just in case. "We were just reviewing it again." The ginger nodded in agreement; he copied the tallest's actions as they were both ready to play once again. Bokuto was already sitting down, twirling the drum stick between his fingers.

With a raised eyebrow, Atsumu didn't question it any further, already knowing that the conversation would go nowhere. He had his guitar pick held in between his fingers, waiting once again for the signal for him to start. The singer remembered Bokuto's words, relaxing his body and loosening his tense shoulders. Once again, the instruments' sounds resonated in the wooden room.

♫

After rolling up the cables and placing his guitar away, Atsumu zipped it up- exhausted from the nonstop strumming and the mentally draining tension. Bokuto had left first, all of them promising to meet up tomorrow on time. The blonde was a little reluctant, hoping that they would go home together- but he thought it was best to be independent for a while, even if it meant he would be stuck alone with the two people he didn't want to see right now. It was only for a short while, but a few minutes could change the tide.

"Atsumu," Sakusa called. The singer cursed under his breath; of course, the germaphobe had heard him but dismissed it just this once. Atsumu glanced up, adjusting the guitar case on his back before properly standing up.

As the blonde stayed silent, the taller continued. "You don't have to write the lyrics if you don't want to." The words hung in the air, the tone being distasteful towards the singer. He didn't like where this was going, and he doesn't know how patient he could be. Today's practice was already drawing the line; it wasn't helping that Sakusa suggested such a thing.

"I'll make sure the lyrics are done before rehearsal," he spat.

"So you started?"

"I did."

Hinata looked between the two, wondering if he should step in or not. He was worried they would lash out on each other- verbally speaking.

Sakusa viewed the twin's posture; he seemed anxious, on edge. "If you need help, you can just ask us."

"I don't need help!" he yelled. He rushed his way out the door before an unnecessary argument took place. He could no longer wait to take a nice warm shower and hop into his safe place called a bed. Atsumu gave a farewell to the music store employee as well as thanking her in the process. The anger almost shrouded his mind, but he didn't want to take it out on everyone he sees.

The subway was minutes away, giving him enough time to breathe before the train would arrive. His guitar case would bump against his back every time he took a step, his golden hair no longer gelled as it fell across his eyes. Atsumu's uncovered ears perked up at a familiar voice calling his name.

_I can't rest, can I?_

The exhausted male continued walking as if he didn't hear him. Hinata was closing in until he was walking side by side. It was obvious that he ran towards him, despite the heavy load in his hands and back. Atsumu's footsteps got faster, trying to avoid any fights that could get out of hand.

"Atsumu-san," the latter cried, trying to keep up with the increasing pace.

The subway was only a few feet away in sight, but it felt agonizingly far with the constant voice repeating his name. He quickly made his way down the stairs, knowing well that Hinata was still following him. Scanning his card, he still didn't turn around as the ginger called Atsumu's name for the umpteenth time.

"Atsumu-san!" Hinata yelled. People turned towards the explosive sound; the blonde finally faced him, embarrassed from the attention.

"Can ya quiet down?!" Atsumu scolded. He was catching his breath, hoping that the train would come any second now. Hinata desperately looked up at the older, his cheeks stinging red from running and the cold air. The station rumbled, meaning the train was soon to approach.

"I know you're mad, you have every right to be mad but-"

"I'm tired, Shouyou. I'm not in the mood for this," Atsumu growled, the train opening its doors for the new and old passengers.

"Wait!" Hinata cried, trying to grab for the other's wrists only to be out of reach. The faux-blonde had already started walking, slipping away between those little fingers of his. As the doors closed, they looked at each other one last time through the foggy glass window. Their eyes only holding onto broken memories, telling each other a story that they both want to say but can't be put into words.


	9. life

_12:24_

_The sun shines the brightest at noon._

♫

Atsumu stood beside the older, anxiously looking around the empty stage to avoid everyone's eyes. A crowded room normally didn't leave the male sweating nervously; it wasn't even that crowded since there were other people from 3 different bands. He deemed it to only be hot in here, and that his nerves weren't the cause of his demeanor.

The band was currently at the Bamboo Rock venue, their second and last day of rehearsal was about to commence after the light instructions. They were going over the order of the performances; the Black Jackals- consisting of Atsumu, Hinata, Sakusa, and Bokuto, to perform last. Yesterday ran smoothly as the bands properly cooperated with the set up and the order. The only thing unusual was that the main vocalist of a certain band wasn't using his voice for the last song.

"Alright, any questions? No? Good," Daichi, the owner of the place clapped his hands to signal the others to get to work. They dispersed, testing and getting their instruments ready as the first band was up for practice. The first band remained on the black stage, the spotlights casted upon them as they were discussing amongst themselves. As the band was ready to play, the Black Jackals made their way to the bar from across the room.

The ginger's pout brought attention to Atsumu, in which he raised his eyebrow. It's little things like these that the blonde realized almost too quickly to notice. Surely, Sakusa knew their past, he was in the center of it- but that didn't mean he wouldn't be jealous at all every time his boyfriend's ex would pay close attention to Hinata.

"What is it?" Sakusa questioned before Atsumu could. The singer's mouth closed shut, this time he was observing from afar rather than standing with them.

"I had a question but everyone left already," the shorter sighed.

"What's your question?"

"If we're allowed to drink before it's our turn to perform!"

Atsumu couldn't tell if Hinata was joking or not. He knew that his tiny little body couldn't handle more than an ounce of alcohol well. It was almost embarrassing to see him make a fool of himself without even trying.

The curly haired male only scoffed at such an idea, "There's no way you're drinking at all, you'd make a mess." Bokuto gave a hefty laugh, slinging his arm around the shorter male as he placed his chin on his shoulder.

"One shot can't hurt this little guy!"

"Who are you calling little? I grew!" Hinata shouted while crossing his arms. "And I wasn't only talking about drinking, I meant if we can just chill in the audience instead of watching from backstage," he explained. Atsumu rolled his eyes at the ludicrous question, but the small smirk plastered on his face displayed his amusement.

"I'm sure that's fine if we ask Daichi-san," the germaphobe confirmed, cleaning the neck of his bass guitar with sanitized wipes. Although, the thought of being close to hundreds of sweaty bodies didn't seem appealing to Sakusa. Both Hinata and Bokuto cheered together, even more excited about the day of the concert while ignoring the nauseated face on Sakusa.

"Why do ya guys wanna watch from the audience so badly?" Atsumu finally spoke, his voice wasn't warmed up yet.

"You should see how people are on stage, it's so cool! They have a presence that goes like- like-" Hinata's rambles turned into swift hand motions. Bokuto nods in agreement as if he understood exactly what the shorter meant. He glanced at Atsumu as the drummer sat down on a nearby chair.

"TsumTsum's presence is no joke though," the older grinned.

"Yeah, you're super talented, Atsumu-san!" the ginger beamed.

The twin didn't understand what they meant. A stage presence that he can't feel even if he was the one performing didn't make sense to him. But even Sakusa agreed with the frivolous two that showered him with compliments. Perhaps it was encouragement for him to finally sing the words to the new song. The old songs that they were going to perform were mastered at this point, but the new song needed much more time in Atsumu's eyes.

About two days ago, the singer completed the lyrics. Atsumu remained restless; he drew out metaphors he wasn't use to, vocabulary that was easy to understand. The words he wrote were from the depths of his heart, but it remained unsung. Only he knew all of the words, the high and the low notes that danced with the song's rhythm. His confidence was dim, almost barely there now that he wasn't in such a good place.

The singer murmured a small thanks to all of them as they continued to talk about the band on the stage. He took note of how they played, trying to grasp what both Bokuto and Hinata complimented him on, this stage presence that he possesses. In the end, he enjoyed the songs as it rumbled and resonated through out the whole venue. The glass drinks shook ever so slightly, and Atsumu felt the vibrations underneath the soles of his feet.

The faux-blonde was too quiet for his own liking. Time had passed, and his band was soon to rehearse their few songs. Bokuto and Hinata were conversing with one another, pointing out details about the other bands' songs and cheering them on as if they were their only fans.

"Wooh, Kenma!" Hinata shouted over the explosive sounds of the drums.

"You're amazing, Kuroo!" Bokuto praised his best friend, knowing his voice was loud enough to hear.

Sakusa was munching on a small snack, scrolling through his phone, and occasionally stealing glances at Atsumu to make sure he was alright. Other times, he would roll his eyes at the noise that the rowdy two were making. The previous band finally finished their rehearsal, making their way down the steps on the side and greeting their friends. There was a five minute break before the Black Jackals would take on the stage.

"Hey hey hey!" Bokuto greeted in which Kuroo chimed in by saying the same thing. Behind him were Kenma, Yaku, and Lev; friends from highschool. While the bands conversed with one another, Atsumu took the time to tune his guitar. He connected its cable to the amp on the stage, grabbing his guitar pick in the process.

It wasn't normal for this much hesitation to overcome him, but the singer stared at his strings. His hand was lifted slightly in the air as if he was ready to give it a strum. Pulled down by apprehension, he strummed weakly, giving off a faint dull sound. Atsumu was snapped back to reality once he noticed the other's joining the stage. The five minutes were up, and it was finally time for their first song.

As expected, their performances were close to perfect. The subtle strums from Hinata was crystal clear, as well as Sakusa's rhythmic bass that complimented his boyfriend's soprano-like adlibs. Bokuto kept his steady beat, drumming away and feeling the thrill through his body. Atsumu was rocking the electric guitar, the adrenaline kicking in and washing away all the anxiety in his fingertips.

With the microphone right in front of him, he sang to his heart's content- occasionally jumping and moving around the stage with the ginger. Although this band was made just for the four of them to have fun and spend time with each other, it was no doubt that they had hidden passion for the music they create. Showing it out to the world in a matter of a few days was a bonus for all of them.

The other bands stayed and watched, cheering them on just like the Black Jackals did to them. After a few songs, it was time for their new one. The song that's never been completed, the song where they all struggled with.

"TsumTsum, it's ok if you don't sing today," Bokuto spoke, giving a thumbs up in the singer's direction. Atsumu knew that it was supposed to make him feel better; it did just a little bit, but he felt like a burden to the band. However, he just couldn't do it. His tongue refused to move, his voice box acted as if it was shattered. Other than the lack of words, Atsumu no longer had trouble with the finger placements and renditions. The instruments melded together beautifully through sound.

♫

The sun was soon to set as the bands gathered their equipment to pack up. They were all drained from rehearsal, wanting food in their bellies and drinks to quench their thirst. There was a sound emitting from the bar, like a spoon clinking on glass. Everyone turned their heads, interested in the sound.

"Since you guys worked hard, drinks on me," Daichi grinned as people scrambled over to the bar. With bows and thank yous, everyone had their drinks in their hands. "Good luck tomorrow!" the owner toasted, in which everyone chimed in and chugged the drinks with delight. It didn't hurt to spend a little more time in the venue, feeling grateful for the free drinks.

Atsumu sat on a couch, popping his airpods in with a regular solo cup of soda. He wasn't in the mood for alcohol, especially after what happened at Bokuto's party. Pulling up a voice memo on his phone, he pressed play. Of course, it was the new song that they've recorded. The blonde didn't want to forget the melody as he hummed along with it.

The short ginger noticed the main vocalist was gone from the crowd despite the distracting and loud laughter. He scanned the area, catching sight of the person he had in mind and made his way across the room. Hinata overheard Atsumu hum; the older didn't seem to notice his ex approaching in front of him as he continued.

As soon as the song stopped, Atsumu jumped in his seat, shocked that the younger was watching him the whole time. He took off an earbud, raising an eyebrow.

"The song is finished?" Hinata asked, never taking a seat next to the faux-blonde.

"Yeah, but I didn't record it yet," he deadpanned, putting back the airpod in. The video didn't replay though as he was stuck listening to the ginger's words.

"Oh, can I hear it by tonight so I can add in the adlibs and harmonies?"

After taking a sip of his soda, he wiped his mouth with his sleeve, "Ya don't need to do that."

"Why not? I think it'll sound great with it!"

The older only glared at him through his swept hair. He knows the other meant no harm. He knows that he just wanted to get this song done so there would be no problems for tomorrow. However, Atsumu's pride was stubborn, having no interest in sharing his scarred heart.

"The song is fine."

Hinata stayed silent for a moment, his smile slowly fading away. Not once did Atsumu look up at the other, eyes glued to his phone screen. His patience was wearing thin once again, and he wasn't looking forward to arguing.

"What is it about, then?" Hinata hesitated, possibly already knowing the answer, yet he dared to ask the golden-haired male anyway. Atsumu knew better than to respond to something so obvious. He may not have a filter for his mouth, but he knew when to control it to open it or not. Atsumu finished his drink, standing up and walking across the room to throw it in the trash. He ignored the shorter who followed him closely behind.

"See ya guys tomorrow," Atsumu waved and picked up his guitar. He made his way outside, yet he wasn't alone. The singer sighed, stopping in his tracks right in front of the concert venue. Finally facing him, Atsumu still had his dark brown orbs sheened in an icy glare. Hinata was there, hands clutching his guitar case who peered up at the older. As if not getting the hint, Hinata continued to push it further, knowing the risk he was taking.

"Is it about Omi-san, you, and I?"

"So what if it is?"

"Nothing! It's just that I'm sorry for everything I've ever done. Omi-san and I never meant to hurt you," he apologized. Atsumu turned his back on Hinata once again, calming himself down with even breaths and a steady pace to walk with. That didn't faze the desperate other from behind.

"I'm sorry that I made you jealous, it wasn't right. I should've talked to you, I should've told you the truth, but I was stupid! I was stupid for not saying anything sooner," he cried, walking faster to catch up with Atsumu.

"Atsumu-san, I loved you. I didn't want to hurt you but I did anyway by hanging out with Omi-san. He respected you, he never did anything when we were together, but I was slowly gaining interest in him."

" _Atsumu-san!_ " Hinata thanked his little body for holding so much stamina.

"What, you're still not in the mood to talk about it?!" the ginger finally yelled, having enough from the other running away every time he wanted to explain himself. Atsumu halted himself, standing there as the cold autumn breeze stung his cheeks. Hinata caught up to him, grabbing his wrists in order for the older to face him.

Atsumu pulled away with brute force, anger and agony plastered on his face. His temper blew, no longer thinking of what he was saying- it just spew out like uncontrollable flames.

"I told you, _I told you_ that what you guys were doing made me more than just being upset! It was wrong, it was frustrating to even think about it. I didn't want to doubt you, I wanted to trust you. I wanted to believe that you and Kiyoomi were just friends and that there were no other feelings involved," he exploded, but he was no where close to being done.

" And you knew I was fucking jealous, and I had every _fucking_ right to be. Not only did you ignore me for days on end, you'd forget about me while you were having fun and hanging out with Kiyoomi. You barely texted me back, not even a single good morning or good night! While I was alone in my dark room, I only thought of the worse. I thought of you cheating on me, and I hated myself for thinking of such a thing, but the longer you were out at night, the more reasonable my thoughts came to be." he choked.

The sun had set, the sky that was once painted in a fiery orange, red and purple turned into a lonely royal blue. The sidewalks were populated, the two drawing attention from the people around them. Hinata could only listen, he was too much in pain to speak back for now. Atsumu took a step closer

"I felt betrayed, because I lost you the moment you laid your eyes on my best friend- and I feel even more betrayed to discover that you've been together for an entire _fucking month_ without telling me! I only knew because Bokkun exposed the both of you while he was drunk. What a great way to know, isn't it? To know that the one thing I was worried about from happening suddenly came true after several months."

"Do you know how hard it was to even sleep- to eat properly? I almost failed a class from a _fucking broken heart_. I burdened my twin brother and Bokuto by crying and screaming and yelling about my problems. I burdened our band by struggling with lyrics. I didn't have to write the song about what I'm going through, but I did because there was no way I could've written something else when this whole situation between Kiyoomi, you and I was all I could think about! Not even this song could express all my suppressed feelings, but it's something!" his voice thundered, tears threatening to fall any time soon.

Atsumu's blood was boiling as he breathed heavily. The two stared at each other, not paying attention to their surroundings, it was just them. The older male couldn't recall the last time he shouted like this, or when he shouted at the boy in front of him. The anger that he bottled up for the past weeks left his body. He wasn't happy, he wasn't pleased at all, but he felt somewhat at ease that he finally got the chance to show his feelings.

"Atsumu-san..." Hinata trailed off as he was left speechless. Atsumu fixed his shirt, turning around as he finally walked off in the distance. There was nothing else more to say between the two, not today at least.


	10. isn't

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a longer chapter for you guys ;D Ty for all the support!! Sorry for any errors ~

_23:17_

_I stood my ground underneath the sun._

♫

The multicolored lights illuminated the dimly lit place in a synchronized pattern. Visitors and guests made their way into the crowds, grabbing non-occupied seats and ordering their food and drinks. The curtains were already open, and it was a few more minutes until the first band was up on stage.

The four bands gathered together along with Daichi, the owner of the concert venue. They were backstage, preparing themselves, and giving one last test run before it was time to perform. Everyone was pumped up, hearing the cheers from the audience and themselves.

"Alright, is everyone here?" Daichi asked, counting heads as he did so. Murmurs of yes and nodding heads confirmed that they were but the Black Jackals were incomplete.

"Daichi-san, Atsumu-san isn't here yet," Hinata answered, biting his lip. His mind kept reminding him of yesterday, the heartfelt words that Atsumu spoke of. He couldn't help but think that Atsumu was missing because of him.

"Did he tell you where he went?"

The three band members shook their heads, "I tried calling him earlier but he's not answering," Sakusa claimed with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

Daichi sighed and shook his head. "It's fine, you guys will be performing last anyway. Just try to reach him before then," he suggested before turning to the other bands. He made sure everything was in place before stepping out onto the stage. The owner gave a brief introduction to the place and who he is, who would be performing, and how long this little concert would last.

"What do we do? Something must have happened, he wouldn't skip this out!" Bokuto assumed, frowning that his best friend lacked the communication skills to answer their calls and texts.

"Relax, we'll split up. I'll contact Osamu to help us out," Sakusa took the lead, scrolling through his contacts to get a hold of the twin brother. "And keep calling him, he might pick up." The taller shook his head, wishing he'd be able to read what was going on Atsumu's clouded mind right now. For such an important day, a simple sorry won't do for when he gets back. The two nodded, hoping the singer didn't go too far.

"Alright, I'll look around the city!" Hinata declared.

Bokuto finally glanced up, "I can go to the park and train station."

"Sounds good, I'll look around his work and our university. Osamu said he'd look in his apartment."

Before the three of them left, Daichi returned from the stage. The first band had started their song, hearing the cheers from the crowds and the voice of the thrilled singer. He noticed the others were about to leave, worried that the band would have to perform without their main vocalist.

"Is there something I can do?" he asked them.

Sakusa thought for a second, "Stay here, he might come back. You can call us if he does." Daichi nodded in response, being in high alert as he watched over his concert venue. "You guys have about two hours, so good luck."

The three of them agreed to meet back here at the venue if they couldn't find him on time, hoping that it wasn't the case. The band was already anxious enough; they all weren't expecting a perfect performance for their last song, but now that untitled leader was nowhere to be seen, they were skeptical of even playing on stage. They all felt it wasn't right to play without an important band member.

♫

Bokuto headed towards the nearest park first- he wasn't great at directions but he's been living in the city of Tokyo for his whole life. He knew some of the knicks and crannies of the hustle life, knowing well Atsumu wouldn't have gone to somewhere loud and crowded. However, it wouldn't hurt to check some of the public places. The drummer sometimes believed in reverse psychology, assuming that maybe his best friend would exactly end up where they wouldn't expect.

Considering that it was a Friday night, the park was bustling. People were often celebrating something special, and couples were walking hand in hand. Little kids ran and played with each other as their parents tried to warn them to be careful. Although the sun wasn't up, the city lights made up for it, illuminating the pathways and green grass.

Bokuto sighed as he checked all the benches, the chairs, and even the swing sets but the faux-blonde was nowhere in sight. He tried calling Atsumu, scanning the vibrant park in case he saw someone familiar. As the call went to voicemail, he started asking around. All the people shook their heads and responded with 'no's'.

The owl-like male sulked as he made his way towards other public parks, however, it ended the same way as the first one did; no luck.

He hoped that Atsumu was ok, considering the mental state he was in. The time they spent together after his birthday party was something that Bokuto treasured the most. They had their jokes and laughs, nights of sleeping knowing they had each other's company, moments of having heart to heart conversations that they wouldn't tell anybody else. His best friend's pain was his own; it never bothered him that they shared it.

The subway train station was just as busy, new, and old passengers walking and weaving through the crowds. There were various types of people, from their fashion to their behavior, but there was no golden swept hair to be seen. Again, Bokuto called Atsumu, ringing for a few seconds until the voicemail clocked in.

♫

The ginger made his way through every store until his legs couldn't carry him anymore. He checked the bar, clothing stores, even the supermarkets- but he couldn't find who he was looking for. Hinata tried his best thinking where in the world Atsumu could be.

Entering yet another shop, he felt guilty for not buying things even though that wasn't what he was supposed to be doing. There were only a few people in there, in which Hinata checked every aisle, trying to catch the familiar figure. Still, Atsumu was nowhere to be seen. He didn't know it would be this hard, but then again, it was a rather large city. Knowing Hinata, Sakusa made sure his boyfriend knew his way around the block.

The possibility of Atsumu actually wandering the city was very low. The shorter noticed how the singer avoided public places now. It's like his whole personality change, but it didn't; he was still the provoking, aggressive, and arrogant being he is, but he still strived to be better than anyone else. He knew how to be the life of the party, and he knew how to be affectionate to people he cared about.

Hinata left the store with nothing in his hands but his phone. He checked it for any notifications; it seemed like the others didn't find him either. The sidewalks weren't emptying any time soon as the clock ticked. There was still time left, more than an hour to be precise, but that didn't stop Hinata from wanting to find him right away.

He couldn't help but hold responsibility for the way Atsumu was acting, no matter how many times he's apologized and explained. Hinata knew sorry wasn't enough, not at all, but he just didn't know what else to say. The ginger would listen to the other's outbursts and it would leave him speechless all the damn time. Of course, what Hinata would say wasn't pretty either.

Suddenly, a guy with blonde hair and an undercut along with a fit build caught his eye. Hinata rushed towards him, yelling his name to grab his attention. However, once the male had turned around, it wasn't Atsumu at all. The stranger gave an annoyed scoff before strutting off. The shorter male frowned, apologizing for the misunderstanding. Atsumu would've had his guitar case now that Hinata thought about it.

♫

Osamu grumbled under his breath, parking his own car in Atsumu's apartment parking lot. He couldn't believe how stupid his twin brother was, for running away to who knows where- and especially for when other people needed him today. He wasn't mad at him, just disappointed that the singer wouldn't talk to them.

The silver-hair saw Atsumu's car, hoping that he really was in his apartment and that they could be on their merry way. Climbing a few set of stairs, he regained his posture and breath before kicking away the welcome mat. The spare key glistened underneath the front light as Osamu picked it up.

As soon as he unlocked the door, he called out for his twin, " 'Tsumu!"

The living room was empty; objects untouched, the blinds were closed leaving the apartment dark. Osamu flipped on the switch to see better, hunching over the couches if Atsumu were to sleep. The kitchen sink was filled with rinsed dishes, and the bathroom lights were off.

Entering his bedroom, the bed was lazily made. The blonde wasn't here, and Osamu didn't see his phone either, meaning he took it. It was either dead or Atsumu was ignoring all the notifications. He groaned in frustration, wanting to find his brother as fast as he can. Leaving the baren apartment, he took extra measures for scouting the whole complex. The twin even asked the landlord if he saw the missing male. The landlord's answer wasn't what he was hoping for.

There was only an hour left, upset that he was missing the music; he would rather find Atsumu so that he could at least hear one band perform.

"C'mon 'Tsumu, where are you?"

Osamu painfully recalled the past events of sleepless nights, talking on the phone with his twin. He remembered the way Atsumu's voice trembled at the latest hour, how his voice would crack while mentioning his breakup. It wasn't the blonde's first breakup, but it was the first time his heart got broken. Osamu remembered how he could no longer say a word, softly crying and being at his most vulnerable. The words that Atsumu would say were self-loathing, putting all the blame on himself when they both knew it wasn't entirely his fault.

He drove around the area before confirming that there was no trace of his brother. Checking his phone, it seemed like the others had no luck either.

♫

Finally arriving at the university, the curly-haired male walked around campus, glancing over college students that he barely recognized. The benches were empty or occupied by other people, and the fountain was too crowded for his taste. Sakusa doubted the singer would be there anyway. He couldn't spot the male he was looking for, the dimly lit lamp posts weren't exactly helping.

Considering Atsumu's major, he went to the Media Arts building. He suspected that he wouldn't actually be in a lecture, but he gave it a shot. The air-conditioned entrance smelled of sanitized products mixed with concrete. The sound of his footsteps echoed off the walls, the ceiling lights illuminating white that reflected off the tile ground. This place was also vacant besides the group of people down one section of the hall.

Other doors were locked respectively, and others were unoccupied lecture halls. Sakusa mentally sighed as he made his way out of the building. The library was right next to him, not sure if Atsumu would be cooped up in there with books. If anything, Atsumu wouldn't read books for fun unless they were children's books.

As expected, there was no faux-blonde guy. Reluctant as he was, the germaphobe went up to people and asked if they've seen Atsumu; none of them had. He slightly bowed before making his way to the back of the library. It was desolated unlike the rest of the ground floor, perfect for a heartbroken male to hide in. However, there was nothing here. Sakusa huffed, heading back to the entrance with no satisfaction.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a warehouse no larger than the tree next to it. It finally hit him, wishing that he realized sooner. The warehouse was off-limits, but Atsumu found the rooftop comfy. Only Sakusa knew about it as if it were their secret hiding spot. It wasn't such a fond memory for the two of them. Hinata had broken up with Atsumu a month before the blonde discovered this place- and well, Atsumu brought Sakusa all the way here for a little talk.

Reminding himself to wash his hands later, the male climbed the vertical ladder. Despite the frustration in the back of his mind, Sakusa let out a relieved sigh. Atsumu's back was facing him, lying down on the cool concrete underneath the city sky. There were lights that gave off a warm glow, enough for Sakusa to see where he was going.

Walking up to the twin, his eyes fell upon the sleeping male's state with his guitar case, phone, and water bottle beside him. He rested there peacefully as if he hadn't slept in days. Although the curly hair was nice enough to let him be, this wasn't the right time. Sakusa kicked him hard enough for him to stir awake from his sleep.

Atsumu's eyes fluttered open to see the taller towering over him. With his mind hazy, he tried to remember what was happening- or if anything was happening at all.

"How'd ya get up here?" his voice was raspy.

"Probably the same way you did."

"What, ya climbed the tree, slipped, and fell down here?"

"You know there's a ladder, right? You're an idiot."

Atsumu gave off a slight chuckle as he sat up from his position, "I am."

Sakusa raised an eyebrow, assuming that the twin would've retorted a comment back at him but he didn't. However, it was good seeing him able to respond so casually.

"Wait-" the singer hesitated, grabbing his phone to check the time. His eyes widened at the amount of miscalls and text messages he received, groaning about how he forgot to set an alarm for him to wake up. With about less than an hour left, the blonde stood quickly on his feet.

"You had us worried," Sakusa spoke.

"Aww, even Omi-Omi?"

"Shut up, I'm leaving you here."

"Sorry, sorry. I couldn't sleep last night so I came here," Atsumu fessed up. The taller shook his head in disbelief, wondering why he was so worried for him. He was about to ask if he really was ok, but considering the conversation they had, it was clear that tonight wouldn't be so bad after all.

The blonde finally texted the group chat that he was alright and with Sakusa. The chat blew up with a thread of jokingly rude comments. Nonetheless, everyone was happy that he was ok and safe. The two stepped down the ladder, picking up their paces to leave the university campus. The walk back was faster than the trip to, but it didn't mean it was preferred to take their time.

With several minutes to spare, both Sakusa and Atsumu greeted the rest of the band. Osamu punched his twin's arm before and after hearing the reason why he didn't bother answering them. Bokuto and Hinata laughed the whole time, getting giddier as time was nearing. All the worries washed away with the single presence of a certain male.

Kuroo's band was playing their last song; its noise surging through the crowd as bodies danced to the beat. Going out with a bang, the supportive cheers and yells erupted. Daichi stood by the side, hidden away in sight as he was proud of the results so far. The band made their way off the stage before realizing that Atsumu was back.

"Atsumu-san! You're here!" Lev beamed, spreading his arms to engulf the other in a hug. Before he could, Yaku held him back. Giving his lazy smirk, Atsumu patted the titan's shoulder, his other hand ruffling the hair on Yaku's head. He received a kick on the shin just as he expected. With no regrets, he spoke up, "The party doesn't stop 'till I walk in ~"

It was quiet for a while until everyone burst into laughter at such a mistake. Atsumu's ears and cheeks dusted with pink as he tried to redeem himself. His helpless stutters drowned out by the majority and the audience from outside.

"You said that wrong!" Bokuto roared with laughter, with Lev, Hinata, and Kuroo to join him. Even Kenma couldn't help but snicker and look away from second-hand embarrassment.

"You tried, bro," Osamu laughed.

It was probably the umpteenth time that Sakusa rolled his eyes, "I think you need more sleep."

The singer could only glare at them jokingly, grateful that they were no longer worrying about him and putting their efforts to cheer him up. Honestly, Atsumu needed some time alone before showing up on stage and giving his all. He didn't think he'd fall asleep, but it wasn't a lie that he had a restless night. He felt better now than this morning, and he was more than ready to give it his best shot. The blonde just hoped he can get through this obstacle that he's been struggling with for weeks, months.

"Alright, the Black Jackals are going up in five, make sure you're all ready," Daichi gave a heads up. They nodded; Atsumu brought out his gold and black electric guitar, already tuned and newly strung once again. The others already had their instruments out with Bokuto twirling his new drumsticks that he got for his birthday.

They all looked at each other, determination and thrill swirling in each others' eyes. None of them exchanged words, believing that their performance will do the talking. Daichi gave a comedic introduction once again, also telling the people of the venue what had happened the whole time the other band's were performing. Feeling exposed, Atsumu sighed in defeat while the other bands laughed.

The band noticed that their cue to come up on stage was finally here, walking on stage with their heads held high. The sea of music lovers clapped and cheered down below.

Atsumu stood on the center of the stage with his hands gripping his guitar tightly till his knuckles turned white. The blinding lights made it almost impossible to see the audience, but as his eyes adjusted he was able to make out his friends and his twin brother. They had drinks in their hands, smiling and encouraging the whole band. He saw familiar faces from his university, even the two highschoolers from before were here to witness the concert.

The singer told himself to relax as he waved, giving off his charming smirk to the people. Plugging in their chords and testing out the microphone, everything was set. With hollers and whistles, Bokuto clapped his drumsticks together to the beat, and soon enough Atsumu, Sakusa, and Hinata joined in with their bass and guitars. They started off with their first few couple of songs successfully, rocking the stage and the core of everyone in sight.

The bass’s low tones seared within the space, producing a vibrating rumble and steady beat that went through the heart. The drums thundered, booming with might and aggressiveness as the cymbals gave its own light accent to the song. Both electric guitars danced together, but you can tell them apart as they clashed on stage. Atsumu’s voice ripped through the instruments, its intricate sound laced the songs with power- as well as Hinata’s harmonies and adlibs that blended and wrapped everything together like a cherry on top

The cheers fueled the band’s souls; the adrenaline was pumping along with the body of people that came to have a good night. Atsumu was focused on his skills, breathing in enough air in order to sing at the right moment, his fingers sliding and pressing on the brass metal strings to create the rhythm- but the whole time, he was smiling. Smiling with the crowd and his band members. The atmosphere screamed entertainment and pure fun, and everything was going well.

“Wooh, sing it Atsumu and Hinata!” a person yelled as the singers belted out a high note.

“Go off, Sakusa!” the crowd cheered on.

“Bokuto, you’re awesome!” Bokuto laughed at the comment, bringing their ninth song to an end.

Everyone screamed and hollered in delight with a few heard claps in the sea of people. Hinata and Bokuto grinned brightly, cheering with the crowd and resting their hands. Sakusa quickly grabbed his bottle of water next to his feet and drank from it, slightly waving at the audience while doing so. Atsumu was breathing heavily, staring into the light with a smile before eyeing the crowd.

“Alright! This is our last song, let me hear you!” Hinata shouted into the microphone; the sea of bodies gave the response he wanted, laughing with them. Sakusa gave a look of concern for a brief moment at Atsumu, who’s smile faintly disappeared into a more serious note.

Before they could start the song, the taller one made his way to Atsumu who covered the microphone so no one would hear. “You don’t have to sing, no one would know. But I’m telling you that you got this, it’s your moment,” he explained, giving a small smile. The faux-blonde smiled back, looking at the other two for confirmation. They both nodded their heads in a way to show support. “Thanks guys,” he said and turned back to the audience.

As Bokuto’s drums kicked in, so did Hinata’s guitar and Sakusa’s bass. On time, Atsumu added his own flare of his electric guitar. His heart was pounding, knees buckling into place. His breathing never calmed down right after they started, and the air felt heavier by the second. Even though his fingers placed perfectly on the frets, his mind became sluggish. Atsumu’s ears muffled all sounds, relying on muscle memory and trying his best to focus on the task at hand.

The part where he had to start singing was soon to come up, bringing dread and anxiety that he pushed away from the beginning. He was scared.

_Just sing._

_Sing it._

_Sing!_

But he never did. Atsumu’s heart sank, disappointment spread across his face, but no one suspected a thing. They believed the song to be an instrumental, nothing out of the ordinary. But he still felt the stares. He could feel his band members glancing over to make sure he was ok, as if he was going to break any moment. It really felt like he was as he grasped onto his guitar, playing away on beat with dissatisfaction on his tongue.

They still continued to play, but it only felt empty as Atsumu tried to move on. He hated himself so much right then and there, questioning himself why he couldn’t just speak and sing the words he struggled to write.

Even so, the crowd cheered on, feeling and dancing to the rhythm not knowing the situation at hand. Atsumu never looked at the audience after that, not wanting to see any looks of disapprovals or pity directly towards him. He wanted them to see him in a different light, wishing he could change for the better.

The singer’s thoughts got to him as the song was played almost halfway. Suddenly, the song became even more incomplete. Atsumu stopped moving his hand, his arms falling to his side, his breaths were more erratic as he tried to calm himself down- and now everyone’s eyes were on him. The air was hot on his skin, having his eyes looking at his feet as he still didn’t make eye contact with anyone. The rest of the band members stopped playing as well, the concert venue whispering and questioning what was going on.

“What’s happening?”

“Why’d he stop?”

“Maybe he made a mistake.”

“Is this part of the act?”

His body couldn’t stop shaking while the voices of others went in and out of his ears.

“Atsumu-san?” Hinata whispered next to him, his gaze filled with so much concern that the blonde had to look away. The pressure was too much, he could feel his head stirring.

_Relax, just breathe._

The thoughts in his head were at war, trying to calm himself down, one telling him to hide away from the world forever, and another encouraging him to give it his all. In the end, he pushed it all away, trying to think at this very moment on what to do. Atsumu gripped the cold microphone, his sweaty hands still shaking from his own anxiety. Finally, he closed his eyes and breathed in, ready to express his heartbroken self to the world.

_"The blood red streaks forming across the sky."_

_"Couldn’t recall when our ocean was running dry."_

Hinata’s eyes widened at the unexpected action. Sakusa took the time to process what was happening right next to him. Bokuto stopped everything he was doing and stared as he was captivated by Atsumu. The first few lines were sung out loud for the first time. Atsumu’s voice echoed, it was isolated, the only thing to be heard as the crowd went dead silent. His breath was shaky, unstable- but it felt raw and clear to those around him.

_"Underneath the scorching setting sun,_

_Our timelines together suddenly became undone,_

_I tried to save you_

_From when the minute struck 3,_

_But the sky was a hue_

_That didn’t seem familiar."_

It was haunting, his deep tone was none other than delicate, fragile. Inspired by the pain he felt throughout half the year, these were the lyrics the singer wrote but was afraid to show.

_"I am lost in time,_

_Cause this life isn’t mine,_

_If you’re not by my side."_

His voice remained low, breathing out those words that screamed with agony. It was heart wrenching; Atsumu was seen as a tough, egocentric, and provocative being; he knew how to throw a party, how to be fun and dance and drink the night away- but this was something different. It showed his vulnerability.

_"As dawn approached, it began to suffer,_

_The glistening March turned into September,_

_A couple side glances turned into loving stares,_

_And I knew that wasn’t just a transparent affair,_

_You tried to save me_

_From when the minute struck 4,_

_But the green eyed demon_

_Was calling my name."_

Endless waves of metaphors resonated throughout the venue. It built up inside of him, his voice swelling up in his throat. Atsumu remembered the way he thought of these lyrics, the memories he wanted to forget began to flood in his brain as he scribbled away on that crumpled paper.

_"I am lost in time,_

_Cause this life isn’t mine,_

_If our strings aren’t tied."_

This time, he belted it out; powerful and evocative. Everything he held back from before was now on display. It tugged at the hearts of others, gasping at the sudden twist in emotions that they haven’t felt until tonight.

_"You started packing all your memories,_

_There was nothing left behind,_

_Untying all the tightropes and_

_The swing sets on the side,_

_You took off all your gifted costumes,_

_Locking all of the cages,_

_Closed the tattered curtains and_

_The spotlight on the stages."_

The octave changed once again, starting off low as the lyrics rolled off his tongue. As it picked up, Atsumu sang this sudden fierceness from the depths of his torn heart, as if he was no longer afraid to show everyone how much strain, suffering, and self-affliction he had to go through to get to this point. His voice rose and fell with rage and longing. Until at the end of his highnote, he breathed in and breathed out like a heavy sigh. It was a tired and slow delivery.

_"But I was left behind._

_I am lost in time,_

_Cause you’re no longer mine."_

As he sang the last words with a soft falsetto, Atsumu let go of his microphone. It hung in the air for everyone to hear, like a haunting lullaby fading away.

The singer finally opened his eyes, the lights gently casting upon him. He looked up from the floor, eyes brimming with tears that threatened to fall at any moment. He didn’t bother glancing at his band members, or anyone else at his feet. The audience was left speechless, and before they could applaud and cheer, the blonde ran off the stage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song mentioned in this chapter is mine, I took the time to write the whole thing just for the purpose of this fanfiction! I hope you liked it ~


	11. mine

_16:38_

_The morning sun broke through the night._

♫

Atsumu sat outside underneath the crescent moon. His guitar was thrown beside him that reflected the celestial’s light. There was no warmth, his thin long sleeves doing its best to keep the cold air away. The concrete was hard and corroded- damp from the light drizzle that passed a few minutes ago. His tear-stained cheeks and swollen eyes were the result of his soft, aching cries.

It took everything in his being to sing out loud, calm himself down. What was said was now out there; he didn’t regret it, he felt more relieved than ever.

The singer heard the crowd when he ran outside the back door. They enjoyed it, they really did as they screamed and yelled. It did cheer him up a bit, to know others can now share this experience of his. He sighed as he began to think back to the events that led up to this very moment. A small chuckle left his lips, but disappeared as quickly as it showed.

Velvety quiet footsteps approached from the right, already familiar from the way it fell on the pavement. This time, Atsumu didn’t turn his back to the other, he didn’t run away, he didn’t scream at him. He let the shorter male sit down next to him as the blonde eyed him in curiosity. The only thing that exchanged between them was silence and faint body warmth- though, there was nothing wrong with it. It felt comfortable, no remorse, no grudges or hatred, just a midnight sky and the two of them.

“See? We told you that you have an amazing stage presence,” Hinata began. The blonde turned his head to look at the younger; he had a small smile while looking at his callused cold hands. Atsumu’s attention was now fully on him.

“I liked your song.”

A simple thank you would do, but it’s as if Atsumu ‘s voice held back. He didn’t really know what to say, so he let Hinata continue.

“The lyrics were beautiful, the melody, your voice- everything!” he let out a sigh afterwards. The twin watched as his smile faded away, a melancholy expression replaced it. The ginger stopped fidgeting his thumbs before making eye contact with the older. Atsumu’s eyes slightly widened, watching the other’s tears glow and fall with the steady beat of his heart.

“I know I keep saying this, but I’m sorry,” he whispered, barely audible for the blonde to hear. “I made you feel- feel horrible? Excluded? I was young back then but I should’ve known.”

The words twisted inside the older’s gut, unable to speak or comfort him. He let Hinata be, giving him time, giving him the chance to breathe.

“I guess in the end, I knew what I was doing but didn’t want to believe it. In the end, I broke our trust- and I.. I hurt you,” his voice hitched in the back of his throat. Hinata looked down, trying to wipe his tears before it became uncontrollable. Atsumu knew he had more to say, but it hurt seeing the younger break down softly as the night became darker.

“Even now, I lied to you about Kiyoomi and I, a-and that made you suffer even more. I talk so much yet I can’t even tell you the truth- “ he stuttered between breaths. The ginger let himself cry, unable to hide his waterfall of tears and shaking hands; his body shivered in response to the cool breeze. Atsumu grabbed his hands, stroking the back of his hand with his thumb in little circles hoping that it would calm him down.

“Shouyou-kun, don’t put the blame all on yourself, it’s not your fault-”

“It is! It is my fault for making you feel this way and I wish-”

“Shouyou-kun!” Atsumu yelled, lifting up the younger’s chin to meet his swollen moon-lit eyes with his own. Hinata was still crying, but more startled and in shock at the sudden action the other had done.

“It’s ok. Ya hear me? I’m ok. It’s not your fault that you began to like Kiyoomi while dating me- and besides I had my own faults too. I kept bugging you and driving you away, we both did things wrong, and we ended up fighting up until now. We weren’t meant to be and it took me a while to get that, but it’s ok.” he explained, making sure his words were gentle this time.

‘You moved on, I’m so glad you did. I’m happy for you both, it was just hard for me to accept it at the time because-” Atsumu inhaled and exhaled, averting his gaze for a slight moment before looking at the dark orange pools in front of him. “- because I still love you. I love you, Hinata Shouyou, but I need to move on.”

“Our new song, it helped me start to try. I just hope we’ll all become… friends again,” he whispered. He took away his hand from the trembling other, running it through his swept hair. The confession made them sit in silence for a moment as they both studied each other’s faces. The faux-blonde lifted tons of weight off his shoulders, grateful that they had this talk. He hoped things would get better in the future. Atsumu stood up, not sure if he’d want to hear anything else from Hinata. The ginger did the same, wiping his tear-stained cheeks dry.

“We should go back, they’re probably lookin’ for us,” he suggested. Hinata nodded, hesitating and contemplating if he should do it or not. As they reached the entrance, Atsumu’s hand was already pulling the door open before Hinata grabbed his attention.

“A-Atsumu-san!”

The older turned to face him, waiting to hear what he had to say before they could go back. He was planning on apologizing to Daichi and the rest of the team. Suddenly, he felt warmth engulf his body; it was refreshing, familiar, and pure. Hinata’s frail arms wrapped around Atsumu’s body in an embrace as closure. The scent of sweet rain mixed with Hinata’s, a comfortable and cozy feeling crept into his heart. The blonde hugged back, taking in the younger’s body build and kind gesture.

“I hope you find someone who will love you forever.”

“That’s so cheesy,” Atsumu chuckled, letting go as they smiled at each other.

“Hey, shut up!”

“Thank you, Shouyou-kun.”

♫

As the red-orange leaves fell from the thin branches, another year has flown by. Ever since the concert at Bamboo Rock, Atsumu’s little incident went viral around the country. The Black Jackals gained popularity with their new song, even if it wasn’t complete at the time. The band was shocked but excited, surprised to get recognized on the streets and see their faces on the internet. A month ago, the four members released an album that included their old songs, as well as new songs.

They were on a bus for their mini tour around Japan. Their schedule didn’t hinder their studies, in fact, it worked well with all of them. With a few adjustments, the four of them were able to get a couple weeks off. Although, projects weren’t out of the picture.

“I can’t believe we’re in Hyogo! Oi, Atsumu-san, do you recognize that?” Hinata beamed as he pointed at a loose pebble. As the light turned green, the ginger waved goodbye to the dusted stone. Bokuto was on the other side of the bus, looking up at the cityscape buildings. He was filming the whole ride, facing his camera towards Hinata and Sakusa.

The taller looked at his boyfriend in disbelief, “Are you stupid? How would he recognize a random pebble?”

“Bye Johnny,” Atsumu joked dramatically, waving goodbye. Hinata giggled, sticking his tongue playfully at his special other. Sakusa shook his head at the two, resuming to surf through his instagram.

“Guys, say hi!” Bokuto said, giving a finger heart to the camera. Even though they’ve said hello a bunch of times throughout their long road trip, they didn’t hesitate to make some noise. The germaphobe grumbled through his mask as he was squished between the three, flipping his middle finger to the camera. Atsumu had to laugh, joining in with the inappropriate gesture. Hinata gasped, desperately swatting at their hands and forcing them to give a peace sign instead.

Soon enough, the band arrived at their hotel. It was sophisticated, way more fancier than they expected. It blocked out the glistening sunlight as it towered over them. They were escorted to their rooms, giving them a clear view of the city; and past that, the mountain terrain.

“It’s so big!” Hinata smiled, throwing his hands up in the air until falling on the twin bed, giving a soft thud.

“That’s what she said,” Atsumu smirked, to which he earned a slap on the back.

“There’s only two beds,” Sakusa pointed out, even if the room could fit one more.

The ginger picked up his face from the mattress, pouting at the taller, “We can share, you know?”

“No.”

“What? Why not?” he cried, finally sitting up. Bokuto was chilling with his camera footage on the other twin bed, snacking away on potato chips.

“Not clean,” he pointed out. Atsumu bursted out laughing, along with Bokuto as they watched Hinata cross his arms like a pouty toddler. “I wash myself everyday! And we have room service here anyway. Omi-san, sleep with me ~” A series of ‘oohs’ filled the room before the duo on the other bed got smacked playfully. Hinata blushed deeply, figuring out what both Bokuto and Atsumu thought of before panicking.

“That isn’t what I meant!” he whined, earning another round of laughter. Sakusa said he was joking with his statement earlier.

The smile on Atsumu’s face was genuine as he looked around the room. It wasn’t something he would’ve thought of at all. He believed he would be in his lonely apartment, staying up late to finish school work, show up at his job in his tired state, and dwelling on the fact that he was no longer with Hinata. This scene before him; he couldn’t ask for any better. This was what he wanted, a fun and stable life with his friends.

Atsumu was comfortable, sitting next to Bokuto as he watched the couple playfully fight. It was refreshing to know that they all got along together, and any past feelings of negativity and anguish was no longer lingering between them. The blonde had moved on, perhaps not ready for another relationship- but he was feeling way better all thanks to the three of them. Plus, the rising success of their band has gotten the singer all riled up, excited to make and play more songs with them.

“Alright, alright, let’s take a nap before we get ready for tonight’s concert gig,” Sakusa suggested.

“What? But what about sightseeing?” Bokuto asked, looking away from his camera for just a moment.

“We need energy later tonight, Bokkun,” Atsumu said before stuffing his own face into the pillow, tired from the long road trip to Hyogo. The oldest took this opportunity to jump on Atsumu’s back, laying right on top of him. The blonde’s eyes shot open, groaning from the heavy weight on him.

“Ohh! Wait, me too!” Hinata cheered before laying on top of Bokuto. Atsumu could barely breathe, wishing he could get some decent sleep without the two of them suffocating him. The ginger peaked at Sakusa, who stood there with a look of disgust. Before he could say anything, Hinata pulled him by the arm, making the germaphobe lay beside the tower of bodies.

“Ugh, can we sleep now?” Atsumu grumbled from beneath the two while rolling his eyes with Sakusa. However, there was no answer as the chaotic duo were already fast asleep. Soon enough, both Atsumu and Sakusa’s eyes slowly closed, as they all slid into a slumbered state.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted a wholesome ending, hoped u liked it :")


	12. end

_"... if you're not by my side."_

♫

end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for taking your time to read this! I had so much fun writing this, and I was surprised by how quickly I wrote everything in just a month! I've had this idea way before, but I never thought it would turn out like this. I wasn't planning to have the band aspect, but I didn't know how to continue the story if I didn't include it in, so tada, band au for MSBY Black Jackals ~
> 
> The song in chapter 9 was something I wrote just for this story only. At first, I had different lyrics, all of it except for the chorus. But it didn't feel right- like Atsumu would've wrote something more extreme, so I changed everything. In the end, I'm really proud of how it came out. I know the tune and melody of it and everything, but I'll leave that up to you guys ;). Anyway, this is too long but as I said before, thank you so much for reading this!! I'm really proud of how it came out.
> 
> And of course, this isn't edited yet so I'm sorry for any errors. Have a nice day guys, hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing <3 - Ronin/T


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